Elevated Air Castle

Global warming

2011-10-30T05:47:00.001-07:00

The sun shines upon the wind
And asked him, where could she be?
The wind replied, "My friend..
She's busy, conversing with the sea..."

The sun was heartbroken, and felt sorrow
"I wish to see her today, and tomorrow..
She is elusive. She borrows my light.
Shares jokes with the oceans...
And hides from my sight."

"Do not despair. Oh Lord of light..
Your warmth is within her.
And she feels your plight
She yearns for you, like you for her
It is this world of blue and green
That seperates you lovers
But here's a secret, oh lord of flame
You two can meet and cheat your fate
Find the eclipse
And you will find your mate"

And so the sun got his master plan, and was so grateful to the wind that he shared his scirching heat with the wind, and the wind then set out heating up everything. And that's the story of global warming. Stupid scumbag wind!

All is new

2011-10-22T23:25:00.001-07:00

Everything's new. And I'm afraid, I might not be the same.

Hello.

2011-10-08T22:44:00.001-07:00

Alone, in silence, in peace
In my thoughts
In my words to myself
I have become a suit.

I have become a part of the machine
A tweaked, sharpened component
I have sinned
I have blessed
I have kissed, and missed
And caressed

I have wondered about time
And sand in space
Smiling faces
And a part of the race
Of conclusions, and passes moments
Of mistakes and blunders
That I cannot erase
Of hourglasses, and lava lamps
And cats and fiddles
And postage stamps
Of airline tickets
And work and play
Of tomorrow..
And today

Of blood and kin, and souls in skin
And candlelights under street lamps
Of Jins and ghosts, and things
I still try to understand
Of returns and departures
And misplaced goodbyes
Of why dear life, must I face
Your sweet lies

I have searched for answers
And purposes
And reasons and more answers
And I have found them
And I am not content
I know there is more to see
More than I can hold
More than I deserve today
Tomorrow must be good
Because I can still smile
Because my hope still hold strong
My peace is within me
But what about the pieces I have left behind
Have I become new,
while killing my old self?
Have I become different
At the cost of pretence?
Or have I become stronger and faster?
I think it must be so.
Because my demons obey me now.
My ghost smiles by my side.
My past has made peace with my future.
And I no longer have to hide
The silent thoughts
The silent contemplation
It is a part of me now
The shadows show me the way
And share their wisdom with me
I am no longer new to the world
The world is new to me.

Creation

2011-07-17T04:04:00.001-07:00

Serenity
Come back to me
And give me strength
And make me complete

Serenity
Where I be
If you were alone
And had no use for me

Oh bliss and joy
Hear my prayer
And help me woo
Your elusive friend

Give me courage
And consistency
To see serenity
Again

Oh mighty one
Hear my will
And let me shine
Through the hollow
In this silence

Give me wisdom
And give me strength
To follow this madness
Give me the gift
Of providence

Hear me Oh Mighty Sun
Hear me Oh Swift Winds
Carry my words through these times
Of condescending ends
Of mirrors broken
Of shattered dreams
Carry my soul through the bends

I want no rainbows, no butterflies
No fireworks that hypnotise
No sugar-coated promises or empty air
Just a little time…
To prepare

For a time of madness
And unspoken truth
Of aggressive instigation
And corrupted youth

Give me silence
And give me thought
Give me light
And all that is not
Give we wisdom
And the power of verse
Give me prayer
To shake this curse

Father, Mother
Bless your son
Give him your strength
Your courage, your wisdom
To help him become
All that is you
And all that you are
Bless me, my creators
It is time..

For your creation to shine.

Become

2011-06-27T14:03:00.000-07:00

Resonate in me
Through these shattered clouds of glee
Resonance, I see
Now how you've come to be

These filaments of truth
These figments of thought
I have come to be
Whatever you’re not

Resonate

Free me from this madness
Free me from limits and mortality
Let me claim my sky
And my one sun
Build my own paradise
Within this one

Levitate

Rise up from the ground
And see your wings shine
And burn the insolence that hinders
Proclaim what is mine

Deviate

Separate from doubt and despair
From damage and repair
From negative handshakes
And hatred in the air

Gravitate

Float, hover, stay
Forever this way
Shine, divine, incline
Shake that thin little line

Become one
Become infinity
Become madness
Become sense
Become true
Become imaginary
Become what is made
Become ordinary
Become what you cannot
Become imaginary
Become what is loved
Become wonder
Become the hated
Become blunder
Become what is joy
Become a smile
Become what is sadness
Become a while
Become become
Become nothing
Become this
Become you
Become me
Become us
Become infinity

Listen to the colours

2011-06-27T13:53:00.000-07:00

Listen to the colours
And watch for the sounds
Taste the emotion
Inside the ground

It doesn’t make sense
Doesn’t have to too
Doesn’t seem plausible
But only to you

I have done the same
And people call me mad
But they wouldn’t know
If only they had

They call me crazy
But they are too
To consider madness
A separation of the two

There is no silence
Within the sound
And no colours
Without you around
There is no sense
If nonsense was true
There is no me
If it wasn’t for you

Fuzzy Sherlock

2011-06-27T13:50:00.000-07:00

There once was a crazy cat
Fuzzy Sherlock he was called
Smokin dreams all through the day
He got high on temptation, they say

He twisted the thought
And moulded his own
All through the night
Through his microphone

And shook the groove
And made the vibe
This twisted cat
Created the jive

“Fuzzy, Sherlock
That’s my name
It’s all I got
All the same”

And so he sang
And made the smiles
And spread his name
Across the miles
And shared the peace
That he adored
This melody
Of evermore

He had the rhymes
And they had him
This little crime
Of musical whims
Of interludes
And a chorus too
This little dude
Could make you groove

“Fuzzy, Sherlock
Yeah that’s what I’m called
I’m not super, or even powered
But I am groovy, baby
To one and all

With the sky as witness
The sun as my jury
I call upon you
With musical fury

With a rhyme and a groove
And a smile and a move
With a wave of the wand
I will make you dance

With a twist of a feather
And a change of ‘whether’
I will gamble with your senses
I will offer you a chance

To join me in my madness
To join all that I represent
I will take over, Oh listener
Without your consent”

And so the trumpets played
And the tambourines joined in
The pianos echoed
The voice of the violins
The drums held the beats
And the bass held the rhythm
The listeners listened
Without division

And sherlock played on
Into the night
His voice like legend
Signified

let us be

2011-06-24T04:31:00.001-07:00

there’s a sun shining up there
burning as we shine in its light
there’s a moon giving it company
at the other end of the night

there’s a shadow seeking a sign
hiding from illumination that can kill
there’s a person in the mirror
waiting until

there’s a street by the river
and a a brook by the bridge
there’s a canyon in the mountains
there’s a river by the mill

there’s continuum in the equation
and an answer that makes sense
there’s balance in the fulcrum
and there’s momentum in tense

there’s a magic trick in the hands
and a rabbit in the hat
there is this in this
there is this in that

there is joy in the clouds
and voices in the rain
there are prayers in the winds
and smiles that remain

there are thought not known
and chances not taken
there is gin in the clouds
of alcoholic sustain

there is a shiver in the nerve
and tinge in the shade
there is a calm in the scene
of this escapade

there is a doubt
and a question’s mark
wrapped in a circle in a box
left in the dark

there are paths taken
and path not
there is crap in the opinion
non sense in the thought

let us sit down and discuss this
let us be magicians
and wave to the crowds
let us change our next
put an end to the doubt

let us be monks
let us produce wisdom from naivety
and talk like we know
and know what we talk

let us be businessmen
and trade our sides
bargain and negotiate
and trade our souls
or let us be us
left to our fates

Led G_D arrive

2011-06-12T23:14:00.000-07:00

Let G_D arrive
Into my rainbow
And give more shades of tone
Let G_D arrive
Into my shadow
And make darkness atone

And when the silence
It prepares to leave
Let G_D arrive with the message
That I was destined to receive

Let G_D bless
And give me peace
And give me strength
To show those who doubt
Just how great I am

Let G_D arrive
Within me
Inside the sphere
Let G_D arrive
Within me
Right here

Electric Dawn - Unfinished Unedited Draft

2011-02-17T08:20:00.000-08:00

Oh pretty one,from the sun
Shinin over everyone
Her whisper soothes, the greatest winds
Her smile brings me the best of things...

Talkin to, these clouds of rain
She thought she had heard them say
Holy lines, lines of grace
Talking of this time and space

She cries to me, out in the rain
Her tears i wish I could have seen
She walks to, the holy tree
Where children play in tomorrow's scene

Oh pretty one, oh pretty one
By the river on the sun
Oh yes its you
I'm talkin to

And then summer came
So did the sun
More sunsoaked bliss
And more than one

Peppermint glows on white-washed snow
And sunny sides to emerald green
She paints this here with shades of heaven
I paint these dreams right in between

Oh girl o'mine, won't you come?
To the river on the sun
Oh girl o'mine, let's overcome
This dream of ours has just begun
Oh yes its you, oh yes it's you
That I'm talkin to
Oh yes its you, oh yes it's you
That I'm talkin to

How i wish this dream would stay
And clarity would stay away
Just for a while, yet if not more
I wish to dream, but I'm quite unsure

Streetlight

2011-01-28T07:44:00.000-08:00

I've slept under streetlight, as long as I can remember
Through summer sun and the nights of December
The light's been kind, and offered me peace
This quintessential figment of sugarcoated belief

And many a night, the night sky gave me form of company
And within it the stars pointed out to me
The trio of God's diamonds, Orion's Belt
Old friends, those 3, they stayed with me
Since eternity

As the night confessed, it was too busy to join us
But we moved on without a word of grief
The rustic streets, the dust on the sidewalk
Where we sat and talked is a thing of yesterday
We laughed at nothing, and talked about everything else
Memories attached, rejoiced, kaleidoscopically
This insane amalgamation of brothers in revelry

The one who knows, before he undergoes
And the one who undergoes, even before he knows
That is what we were, what we are
Pieces of a mirror broken, repainted, thrown into the stars
And I sit here and remember
I drift away
To those nights of December..

In those nights, under orange streelight
Under the 3 stars for company
We watched and conversed
And drifted away with the winds
That had come to greet us by
We drifted and disappeared
Into skies crystal clear
Into the sun within the stars
Over tunes ethnic sitars

We smiled at the cosmic,
And the universe,
We smiled at nothingness,
And the simplicity of All
We shouted out to the Universe..

It answered our call.

Who are we to question this madness?

2011-01-25T14:45:00.000-08:00

In this silence and weakness
The wizard makes his move
The conductor orchestrates his army
And the bassist lays his groove

Who are we to judge this madness?
Who are we to question this question?
Submarines and and tangerines
Candy canes and hurricanes
Bubbles of mystic dust
Floating curiously over window panes

We are the mist in the smoke
The dew in the air
And as the sun makes its peace
We wait, and prepare

Who are we to question this madness?
Who are we to question at all?
The Universe sends for us
And so we answer its call

Who are we to question this madness?
We are the angels in the graveyard
The children in His garden
We are the shadows that answer no call
And yet, we are all
We are eternity and joy
And the void in the dust
The conundrum of questions
And the answers if we must

We are the wind conversing with the sky
And the bullets without a path
The fools asking questions
The fury, and the wrath

Little one, we are you
And you we
Check the mirror
And see...

So you see...

2010-11-16T03:49:00.000-08:00

This hope I've bought
Is not its worth
I got it at a bargain sale
One with a million other things
That hurt

This hope I've got
Is not as great
As they claim
In its existance
It has given me
Just the same
Again

But perhaps the flaw
Is on my side of the yard
Perhaps I am the flaw
Perhaps I am the fall
I'd like to believe these things
I'm bored of all this hope
This never-ending optimistic facade
This sacred prayer that's got me fooled
The condescension it has annoys me
And dreams are not the same
The notes play themselves
The harmony orchestrates itself
The melody arranges itself...

All that was fine and acceptable,
But what annoys me...

Is that the listener is out of a job.

One step down.

2010-09-01T11:06:00.000-07:00

One step down and the stairway flows
Two steps up is where it goes
Three steps in between the part
One more step is where I start

Steps flow like the day
Flow away take me along
Where are we going Oh where are we..
Going
Within these stairs we belong

Singing words of wisdom
And songs of rhyme
Singing words like these
Of our time

We walk together
In our staircase
A vertical spiral of questions
Our staircase, we embrace.

In love, in peace
In togetherness we release
We take a step
To conjugate
We take a step...
And elevate.

The Chicken and the Egg.

2010-09-01T02:52:00.000-07:00

Abdul: Who came first, the chicken or the egg?
Me: The Egg!
Abdul: How?
Me: Dinosaurs.
Abdul: Where'd they come from?
Me: The Chicken.

... has arrived.

2010-08-13T14:13:00.000-07:00

In the ambience and aperture,
Lies a moment waiting to be caught.
A lens awakens,
And a portrait in panorama lies in wait.
Pixellated, isolated
Indefinitely saturated,
The reds, blues and greens wait for their command
The light is summoned,
And the aura is now here
It is cropped
And panned
and eclipsed
In her hand

The light listens to its master
The blurs and shadows take their place
In focus, the stage is set
And she shoots..

Once again,
She captures infinity
And smiles...

Lydia Grace has arrived.
And we're glad she has.

Happy Birthday Lydia Grace . Thank you for all the captured smiles, moments and dreams. Today, you are born again.

We're one, and many

2010-08-10T15:13:00.000-07:00

We're one, and many
We're an epiphany
Like crystalline drops of dew
We're one and the few

We're what keeps us going
We're what shakes our tree
We're the apples in the orchard
We're the dew on the leaves

We're what rattles the cage
And what makes us wise
We're the tide and the storm
We're the shadow you despise

We're Lydian, and Zoob'd
We're Fuzzed up to the A
We're Judas and Juno, and
We're Rebel and Lyra
We're Oriyan, Chinese
And Arab and Mar
We're Ritdz, We're Riz
We're all the colors of the rainbow
And any face of the dice
We're the mirror in the mirror
A sugar-coated surprise.

It's got to be...

2010-08-09T11:03:00.000-07:00

We've had our good times
And we've had our bad times
We've had our inconsistencies
In our share of crimes

We've had our sunrises
And we've had our sunsets
We've had our moonshines
And we've had our rejects

It's got to be...
It's got to be.

We've had our glory and
We've had our screwups we understand
We've had all these times inside our heads
When everything slipped through our hands

We've had Orion's belt
And we've had many more
Contemplating conjugating
As we reach the shore

It's got to be...
It's got to be.

We stayed as one
And we left as one
For one we are
For years to come
And once the rain, it tires away
Our sun shine shine
And we still stay
Our sun shine shine
And so shall we
And we shall see
Each other again
And sit together
And mix coffee and tea
And drink as one
And drink as one...

It's got to be...
It's got to be.

Razzmatazz and Zilch

2010-07-22T12:26:00.000-07:00

Saturn's rings in a cocktail
Sunrays in a seashell
The smell of summer in a teacup
And a beautiful lover's spell.

Cat Pianos and Sea Bears
Under glowing lights in electric nights
Hypnotized and mesmerized
By her, and her sight

The winds of Venus
A sunset's dying blush in summer's bleeding veils
Ghosts who shed their hosts
And trees turning to soil

She's a beautiful addiction
And she nurtures my thought of light
She strengthens me, and gifts me with love
A warm smile, a warmer embrace
A tender touch, a soft caress

She shines in illumination
Bringing me to the light
Every time I wander apart
She brings me close to myself
And becomes a part of me
In her smile is mine and mine in her's
A Whisper of nine,
A raindrop of time,
to hear you breathe,
that sigh of relief,
to seek that what you know,
the half of the whole.
to swell and break,
not into song, but into a wave,
into a run, and into the rain.

Razzmatazz and Zilch
Cranberries and Whiskey
Moustaches and fringes
Caramel and Coke
Pineapple and Blueberries
Mars and Venus
Clownfish and Brownies
Love and Joy..

There's a smile in the air.

In a word

2010-07-10T16:13:00.000-07:00

In a word...
Yes.

When clouds grew tired
Of crowded scenes
And move aside for suns to shine
There comes a time
For a shiny mystic surprise to arise
Wrapped in condescension
For all to see
In elusive glitter of awe and mismatch
Within this picture of a thousand words
In fallacy
Draped across the sky
I saw an idea, waiting to hatch

Heaven's gates were rusted
With the disbelief of a million souls
And the questions of a million more
Heaven's gates were rusted
It's angels fallen and bruised
If not more

Wings tainted, they circle their own thoughts
Questioning existence that was once accepted
And loved and cherished
Like shadows asking for light
Knowing that it kills them
And asking anyway

Mortal and weak
They realize that they must move on
For the dust of real dreams
Surrounds them like the wind
Flowing gently, flowing free
Like liquid death
Engulfing, engaging, entangling
Disappearing in them
While they disappear in themselves

Or perhaps
It is all but a lie
A beautiful conundrum
A subterfuge of sorts
Pandora's box of troubles
In the hands of Mr. Fox
A dream of dreams
A bluepill if you will
But give me a choice
And I'll give you the kill

Dear misery

2010-07-05T13:02:00.000-07:00

Dear Misery,
I hope you've been happy
With what you've done
I don't miss you anymore
And I don't think I ever did
I despise the times we had
And the experiences we've shared
And I have no place for you anymore.

The contriteness is gone now
And so has the empty shallow
The shadows hate the shade
And now follow the light
They are enlightened and no more.

The sad faces have been promoted
With a million smileys each
And they wear them all the time, dear misery
I don't think they miss you either.

The despair, Dear Misery, has taken a leave
And has been taken over by solitude and peace
Old friends who've learnt their ways
From the old man under the holy tree.

The pain, Dear Misery
Was touched by grace
And decided to mend its ways
It heals now. And is very happy with itself.

Dear Misery,
I hope you have something else to keep yourself busy
Because I've moved on
And so has everyone else.
And just for the record
You are a b*tch!!

We have found each other

2010-07-02T12:43:00.000-07:00

Spiraling through corridors
Of facades and faces

Of common names and commoners
And pieces of plays shattered on the wall
Deliverance lies within a door
Within itself
And without

Beyond this horizon lies an answer
That answers them all again
Rising up from the ashes of unanswered curiosity
Juxtaposed in its caress and tenderness
In totality it finds itself
Unshaped and rare, untouched and pure

This significance, this existential substance
Of time and space tucked away
And let be, and left to blossom
And left to seek freedom from voids
In its absence lies the answer
And in its presence the solution

Ask, and you shall infer for yourself
The benefit of doubt
The privilege of questioning my fide
And asking things that were unasked
Unshaped and rare, untouched and pure

But to walk with me you must walk faster
Each step taking you away from yourself
And yet you do so every time
Playing your role in this script incomplete
With a tear and a smile
A slave of your own freedom
A multitude of reason

We have found each other
Like old friends, we shared our time
And carry in us the dust crystalline
Of thoughts unspoken, of words clear
Bring into this idea your jaded smile
Your desolate plea of acceptance
And you will be left with hands empty
And minds full

We have found each other
My time and me
And while we talk the All waits
This beautiful trust takes us
Into its embrace
And we sit, talk
And share ourselves
And watch the sun depart
In clandestine
Amaranthine
In echoes and shadows
And in reflections

We have found each other
And we cannot help
But feel lost again

Butterscotch Gold

2010-06-05T09:34:00.000-07:00

I saw a butterfly and in its eyes i saw your sky
And cherry pie for the guy who saw it here
I saw its rainbow wings n in it things that made me smile
I know you see us in this while

This piece of me is yours to take
With cherry cheese a slice of cake
This butterscotch in lemonade
This tenderness we serenade
And on the moon we find our peace
And build our walls from cherry trees
And shake the sun to make it shine
In this heaven all of mine

I saw butterflies and in their wings I saw your face
Saw you take me to that place
Where smiles are sold without a price
The marketplace of surprise
And that is where I saw you play
This moment back to yesterday
I saw you smile I saw you blush and glow

Make a wish and wish again
Wish for wishes in the end
And in the crystal ball of fire
Find the joy that you desire

You are my eyes inside these skies
Butterscotch gold you are divine
You are the touch in an angels sigh
The clouds in heaven, in disguise...
Oh sweetness mine you are divine
You are the sun that makes me shine
Stay with me and spread the love
Shine on me, from above!

Justicedude-001

2010-03-16T12:17:00.000-07:00

I've started my own strip, and I hope to put a new one up every week. Close friends already know of this, and i hope they don't kill me for reposting the old strips, but I want them to know that this is for those 3-4 people who read the blog.

PS-Click on the thumbnail below to maximize it. Cheers.

Remember December

2010-03-16T12:10:00.003-07:00

Remember December
When children play in yesterdays I sing along with birds at play
I smile within and see today it's just the same as yesterday

Dipped in cherries these clouds of dreams
They seem so beautifully obscene
In between I awaken only to fall asleep again
I'm counting sheep but only, but only, ten

Remember December
That's when time leaves and memories return
And together we gaze amazed at stars that burn

Mellowed out thoughts in cotton candy shells
Like bullets of sugar under my spell
Kaleidoscopic wind mills I spin within
Only to sit down and smile with sin

Remember December
It's served it purpose
And it's done it so well
Now bring me my blessings
I have prayers to sell...

The pinnacle...

2010-03-16T12:10:00.001-07:00

I look to the west, to a departing sun
I see no smoke, and yet it burns away
Bringing to us, this light and day

I look to the stars, and I see starshine and moonshine
And yet here I am in the dark, searching for a lantern
To illuminate this road of mine

I look inside others, and I see hatred, greed and chaos
And when I look again, I see love, peace and joy
Maybe it's not them at fault, maybe I'm just flawed
Or maybe I just picked out a bunch of morons to look at.. Aww!

I see within myself, and I see reasons to harmonize
To phrase my thoughts, tap them out, and slapsticize
I see Gods of groove around me, and I feel blessed
And it doesn't hurt to know, that I am on the road they chose.. Yes!!

I am the tortoise that sleeps in his cage
I am the walrus that shall amaze
I am the imagination in your miracle
I am you, and you are me, and together we...
The pinnacle.

- - -

2009-12-27T10:00:00.000-08:00

A ray of sun, a piece of broken smile, and endless solitude.

A glass of life, a share of moonshine, and some more..

A distance and a vision, and two feet to get me there.
A hope, an intuition, and some time to prepare.

A wandering thought, a question without doubt
Another thought after that one, and way leading out
Some destitution, some anarchy, some ignorance, and some bliss
Some union and harmony, some sounds of peace
And some of this.

Discover

2009-11-16T13:57:00.000-08:00

A new day awakens
A new word speaks itself

A mother speaks, a son listens
A star shines, a flower glistens
A thought appears, a meaning follows
A path unravels, through joys and sorrows

It is said that we are chosen by our choices
It is we who are to be blamed, not the voices
We are the faces, we are the ones we see
Why is it that we still ignorant be?

Thoughts and joys, whispers and conundrums
Masks of lies and smiles, you know it has begun
Shutters click, doors close, footprints we make
In these sands of time we try to hold at stake

Discover smiles and joy, discover creation
All over again
Discover walls and chains, discover mortality
All over again
Discover madness and fear, discover reality
All over again
Discover catastrophes and miracles, discover unknown
All over again

Wake up to a ray of sun, in your solace of shine
Wake up to colors and stars, in this dream of mine.

Come. Fly with me.

2009-10-22T07:12:00.000-07:00

I see paper planes over planes of reason this season they change their flight. Like a derailed train of thought, they exchange reasons for plight. I see the sun watching over them like one would watch a child, like a giver who gives, and seeks a smile. I wanted to be a part of this, but it was all so grand, and, I wonder, If I wasn't so small would I be accepted into this plan? I waited and watched for things to come into play, like a child waiting for its mother to take it away. Rays of hope that shine, come to mind, in this lucid verse of joy, singing songs, bringing reason and substance, and with it a dream made from the dust of a thousand stars, that shine far and wide. Do I get to witness a miracle that will bring to me the change I wish to hold in my hand? If I do, then hold true, and wake me up before I realize that something, someone, far more greater than my being, is toying with me.

Wake up with the sounds of heaven in resonance, with the bells of Eden in a vibrato, ever so blissful, beckoning you to walk along with smiling angels who don't care what you did last night. Enter a world where a brother knows a brother, and a son loves a mother, where joy and hate cannot co-exist, merely because negativity is not allowed to pass through the gates. Where birds sing from their heart, where the sun is allowed to shine with the moon, and the stars make their presence and applaud in silent approval. Witness nativity. Witness the daylight under the moon, witness decisive victory of hope and love over tragedy and dismissal.

Walk with me into this song sung by innocence, into this grand story, one with a plot that shall thrill you, and gift to you an eternal smile. Are you ready to embrace the shine of a million stars in attendance? Are you ready to pass the gates? Look within your exterior, and let the words jump out by themselves, let them guide you through your way. Let peace do the talking, while you walk into the midst of humble glory. Simple. Beautiful. Eternal.

Come. Fly with me.

Note: This is an extension of this, and this.

Chapter m - Draft 1

2009-10-21T00:05:00.000-07:00

The curtain falls. This tale has ended for one, and begun for another. It's raining outside. Vaporized clouds of doubt unquestionably decide that it is now time for them to pour on, to pour upon the alchemical fire burning within, raging, seeking solitude and peace, an illusion of serenity that is elusive yet mystic, hidden yet felt in the air. Noone's watching now. But everyone's waiting to find out the outcome of this glorious battle, merely because it does not involve them. Just their undivided attention. Their undivided uncalled-for attention.

Maybe it really is time for a Scene-2.

He picks up his umbrella and readies himself with the thought of waiting out into the rain. The selfless rain. Maybe it might take the load off his mind, distract him from the one thing that's been bothering him all day, making his insides turn over. Himself.

Dusting his anxiety aside, he replaces the thought of consequence with a far simpler one. One that promises to be true and simple. One without any strings attached.

Aller manger. Aller manger. Nous devons manger.
(Go eat. Go eat. We must eat.)

He walks slowly. Today was nice. No bloodshed. No crying faces. No reasons given and no questions answered. The rain gets harder. He doesn't care. If he could, he'd shoot it in the face.

That reminded him. The gun needed cleaning.

Note: In case you're wondering what this is all about, you might want to read this..

-Faiz

The family

2009-10-15T12:52:00.001-07:00

The things that mean the most to you, can almost always fit in a photograph. ;)

Captain Schmack and his mentally-messed-up merry men

2009-10-14T22:34:00.000-07:00

Avast Ye!! All Hands Hoay!!
Land is near, land is near!!
So don't you dare falter
Don't swing the lead, don't break for air
Or I'll run ye through the Hempen Halter!!

On a shallow face we got to see
A smile wickedly wrong and a wizened crack
The sun came up from empty slumber
But sadly so did Captain Schmack

With bearded glee he emptied his scabbard
Out came the iron and smiled a rusty shine
With a wave and a motion he called us on
And so we did that very time

We were a happy lot we were and we hoped we'd stay that way
But our dreams were crushed like fish and guts
When the captain asked us what work we did
We had nothing left to say

And then we saw all hell break lose and we saw his nostrils flare
We thought he'd kill us we did and so we started to prepare

"You fools I'll break all your bones I will
And then grind them to dust
And when I'm tired of all the grinding
I'll use it to clean the rust"

We were scared and trembled we did, we shook beneath his feet
But again we saw his nostrils flare, 'twas such a comic treat
And though his voice sent shivers and tremors and shook our bones
We saw his nostrils we did so we hid our laughs with muffled moans

The sky was blue and the ocean too
And the sun came up to see, overhead
The gulls were up and flying with cheer
More sunshine and food for you and me, they said

We waited on as the bearded dude
Wailed and wailed and wailed unfortunately
For hours and days and years and years
A few minutes at most, for anyone but we

We wished he'd fall, or get a stroke
But that was not to be
He wailed us on and we wished for death
A pleasant and elusive actuality

And then it happened, the mother miracle
We jumped with glee as stopped his clapperclaw
And then it came all over again
More verbal sticks n stones from within his rotten jaw

As night drew nearer and death grew dearer
We wished he'd shut the hole over his neck
We were astonished at how he admonished
Every single man on the deck

But stopped he not and carried on and on
And years went by and all of us grew old and frail
And on a fine day merry our prayers were answered
The kook bumbled his poise and lost his voice he tripped his foot and hit the sail
And fell off the rusty ship.

That night we had rum and gin and everything else we could
For no fool there was to grind and chop our brains or keep us from our food
But alas 'twas not to be, our joy was killed as we had come to see
A figure in white and bearded glee appeared, a sequel to tragedy.

We could take no more
No rants or shouts of gore
And so this step we decided to skip
And soon the folk in town heard the news
Of the day when an an entire crew at sea
Jumped off their sailing ship.

Time to share!! (Share001)

2009-10-12T14:06:00.000-07:00

So yeah, I've been in the process of writing a super cool post here, something super humorous and all.Haven't been successful so I'll just share stuff I've been reading/playing/watching/acutely observing.

Note: For the ignorant, it pays to have an account at delicious.com, the social bookmarking site.

(I) I'll start with my favorite of all these. The art and the experience.
Wake Felderman' Art: As per his site, it's "a social experiment about communication". Wonderful art depicting metaphors. See it to get it.
50 States Project - Photographers from each of the 50 United States were asked to take one picture of people, landscape, habitat, and industry.
Aerial Virtual Tours: - Explore large-scale photos taken with a remote control helicopter, stitched together, then given a navigation interface and soundtrack.
Infinite Photograph: Every pixel in the photograph is another photograph. And so on..

Invading The Vintage: Sci-fi imagery put into vintage Swiss postcards.

Insect Lab: Guy replaces parts of dead insects with clockwork and watch parts. Results are astounding.
200 SUEÑOS ILUSTRADOS : Awesome illustrations of childrens dreams.
Scribbls : "Bees plus flowers gives you honey. Pie and rat together make "pirate." Putting any two things together is bound to have an interesting, even hilarious, effect—or outcome. At Scribbls, you can combine thousands of different drawings to create an infinite number of outcomes."
Neave Anaglyph : "Do you have a pair of those red-blue 3D glasses lying around? If you do, whip 'em out and start doodling big wiggly lines in 3D." Loads of other insane psychedelic/unreal experiences here. Do check.
Markus Neidel: A long parallax-animated piece of cartoon art in an interactive interface, with creepy sheep and other imagery.
superZOOM: Recursively drawn art with a great zoom interface.
Picasso's Guernica in 3D: A video by Lena Gieseke that explores the dimensions of the famous painting.
The Impossible Art Of Li Wei: Insane photography.

II)The literature/Reading material.
Longest Poem in the world
Unnecessary Quotes
Top 10 worst company URLs:The irony is just, .. there.

(III) The videos come next.
Eternal Moonwalk: Never ending moonwalk. MJ lives on!!
http://soydeaire.labuat.com/ - Interactive music video!! Move the cursor around to the sound of Spanish band 'Labuat'. Create your own music video. Way cool and fun!!
Kutiman-Thru-you - 01 - Mother of All Funk Chords - Artist creates songs by mashing up samples taken directly from YouTube videos. Check his youtube homepage for more.
Incredible Webcam Collaboration: - A music video for 'Hibi no Neiro' by SOUR. Features some amazing webcam trickery.
Video from the Sushi’s Perspective - A tourist in Japan places her video camera on a sushi conveyor belt at a restaurant. It travels for over seven minutes and confounds the kitchen staff.
Superman - Native Tongue - Hyderabad-based band Native Tongue's latest music video. Really neat stuff.

Lasagna Cat - A collection of twenty-seven live-action re-enactments of Garfield strips, all featuring music videos or other presentations. Rubber Johnny: Creepy flash video.

(IIII) The games!!
Canabalt - A long daring escape. Damn cool!!
Red Remover - Crazy addictive game where your goal is to remove the red shapes without letting any green shapes fall off the screen.
Whack your Boss - Find 17 ways to kill your boss. Very bloody and gory, but ironically, pretty funny too.
Fantastic Contraption - Physics-based game, damn fun for the mechanically inclined ;)
lose/lose - Lose/Lose is a video-game with real life consequences. Each alien in the game is created based on a random file on the players computer. If the player kills the alien, the file it is based on is deleted. If the players ship is destroyed, the application itself is deleted. Ha ha ha!! Eat bytes!!

Have fun.

Cheers and regards,
Faiz

100th POST!! Walk along talk along

2009-10-10T14:56:00.001-07:00

Walk along talk along
Be free, and stay with me
Lets walk thru this grass
Spread thru eternity

Pick out a song and sing along
Make up the words while I belong
Sing out to joy and sing to the rain
Sing to the children coming out to play

And when the sun shall set, I promise to you
I will be here, your hand in mine
Watching the sun leave our side
And waiting for the rain.

Note: I didn't realize that the blog neared it's 100th post until I finished this post. WOAH!!

Flight of the White Phoenix

2009-10-10T14:10:00.001-07:00

He looks, observes, never to be seen. He hears, listens, never to be heard. Music is not whimsical avocation. It is prerequisite. Obsession. Prayer. Consumed like the Light of Angels sent down from Heaven.

He knows.

He waits.

He is a fool.

A fool of many words, of many faces, lost in a crowd chasing oblivion. He prays. He seeks solitude. He seeks peace and serenity. He has no name. Just a conscience, woken up by the sounds of silence. It is his only companion, his only friend. Like a shadow in the light, it follows him everywhere. It guides him towards the right, towards the light, watching him, his every move, his every step, his every flaw. It reminds him that he can question nothing, that he must hold his peace.

They are good friends. I have seen them many a time, under The Holy Tree. They sit and talk under the rain. They are one. He seeks a blessed state in the Kingdom of God, in sinu Abraham. He sleeps under the silver moon, in the Garden of Eden. He drinks from the Holy River. He rides on the wings of the Great White Phoenix, waiting for oblivion to pass him by. He prays, and drifts away into the mystical horizon, never to be seen, or heard, again.

Something everyone needs to read

2009-10-07T16:34:00.000-07:00

You can have your army Kakhis,
And your navy blues,
Here's a different sort of fighting man,
I'll introduce to you.

His uniform is unlike
Any you've ever seen;
And the Germans called him Devil Dog,
But his real name is Marine!

He was born on Parris Island (San Diego or the Hills of Quantico)
The land that God forgot.
The sand was 14 inches deep,
the sun was blazing hot.

He'd get up every morning,
Way before the sun,
And he'd run a hundred miles or more,
Before the day was done.

He fought in the cold of Korea,
In the heat of Viet Nam.
When ever our country goes to war,
The Marines are first to land.

We'll fight them on the ground,
We'll fight them in the sky,
When the Army and Navy are heading home,
The Marines are standing by.

And when he gets to heaven,
To St. Peter he will tell,
"Another Marine reporting, Sir,
I've served my time in Hell!"

- Hal Popplewell; USMC 1971 - 1979

My day, today

2009-10-05T14:23:00.000-07:00

This is going to be one of those funny random things you read at random sites by random people, randomly. By the time you're done with thins you're almost going to laugh.

Woke up early today. 1pm only.
Fell out of bed.
Had breakfast at lunchtime.
Told mom I love her only.
She took lite.
Sat on the comp.
Checked mail.
Checked friend's myspace.
Called him, talked about stuff.
Ran out of balance.
He called back.
Told him Sorry I don't have balance and hung up.
Realized I was a jackass.
Read the paper, got depressed with the world.
Read the comics. Found more sense there.
Got stuck in a crossword.
Figured it was not worth it anyway.
Tried to do a jigsaw, but it was broken.
Made a prank call.
Realized I didn't have balance after I hung up.
Went out to get fresh air.
Ended up with a smoke instead.
Met a friend, wished the others were free.
Met the others.
Made a funny joke.
Noone laughed.
Tried again.
Almost got beaten up.
Ate Schewerwerffwrtzzz-wan noodles.
Talked about future plans.
Ended up with movie plans for weekend.
Came back home.
Watched a movie.
Had a donut.
Felt good and happy.
Drooled over the Bentley Supersports and the Phantom Coupé.
Wished I had a Shelby instead.
Asked sis to become a follower of this blog.
She said no.
Asked kid brother to become a follower.
He said no.
Bribed him with candy.
He ate candy and then said no.
Asked mom to become a follower.
She said she already was.
Realized 30 minutes later that she was talking about God.
Reminded myself to ask you to become a follower.
Spent the late evening over chai.
Wished I had a Chocolate Latté at that point.
Realized I spent the day without saying a single cuss word.
Celebrated by exclaming "holy sht this is fckin awesome".
Realized I blew it.
Didn't care.
Realized I didn't have my wallet.
Didn't care.
Remembered that I lost my wallet.
Called home.
Realized I didn't have balance.
Borrowed phone and called home.
Realized I left my wallet at home.
Realized I have to recharge phone.
Realized I left my wallet at home.
Came back home.
Realized I had to recharge phone.
Realized I had a recharge card in my other jeans.
Recharged phone.
Called a friend.
Got shouted at.
Hung up.
Realized I need a new daily routine.
Wrote this detailed account.
Made up my mind to stick with it.
Decided to start tomorrow, most definitely.
Forgot to ask you to be a follower.
Wrote this.
Went to bed.

A word to all

2009-10-03T22:32:00.000-07:00

A long time has passed since I started blogging, and many a few people have crossed my path. I thank them all. The blog has gone a lot of changes since it's birth, and I hope that now it has taken a shape that will be considered "permanent". There's a lot of new stuff, and a lot of the old as well. Stuff from all walks of life, about all walks of life. There's always something or the other that'll appeal to you. If there isn't, then in due time there will be. I have been pondering on the subject of expansion... there are a lot of good writers out here, so I think I'll let them in on the action, give them their own cut on this. More minds at work, more thoughts at play. Maybe. Just maybe.Watch this space.

Regards,
Faiz

Make me dream, will you?

2009-10-03T22:31:00.000-07:00

Make me dream, will you?
I'm tired of being awake
Make me dream, will you?
Do it, will you, for my sake

In every nightmare dwells an awakening
In every thought of joy a blessing
In every tear lies a thought of concern
And in every journey a point of return

In every weakness is an ounce of strength
In every thought a point of sorrow
I see myself turn back at a junction
Where my yesterday turns tomorrow

A cup of tea and a million thoughts later
I'm still where I'm supposed to be
Maybe it isn't in my hands to question
This thought of uncertainty

There is a joy in my every move
One that makes want to get near
A joy, a smile, a wordless wonder
One that makes it all so clear

I sit back, smile and wonder
Is it all another blunder
Make this dream real, make me smile again
Make me want to wish I was dreaming...

Make me dream, will you?
Make me dream, and I'll do the same

Make me dream, will you?
You bring the green, I'll get the change...

FAIZ

2009-09-30T20:10:00.000-07:00

Faiz:

Translations:
Arabic - Victorious
Sindhi - Grace/favor
Afghan - Knight

Crazy shit.

i am a messenger

2009-09-30T13:53:00.000-07:00

Let cellophane skies wrap up plastic clouds and more
Let rain pour down through holes on heaven's floor
Let this thought tear through lots of reason
And let the sun reign over occasional season

Break a rainbow and give it to the poor
The sad, the lonely, defenseless and more
Or share a smile instead, but make it pure.
Take a stone's throw and add steps few
Walk to the rainbow and cross right through
The world's a big smiley, but only if you're sure..

I see myself lost in these words few
Of these choices these voices, in between
These alphabetical arrangements of symphonies true
These words at play condescending egoistic scenes

Wrap up my world please, I'd like it on the go
And throw in a chocolate muffin, just so you know
I am a messenger, a conductor of reason and thought
My soul is in my wand, but it's the best one I've got
I am a messenger, thrones bore me to death
I'd be a jester but I'm a pauper instead
But I try and I try, and I'm unsuccessfully glad
I'm the worst of the lot, but the best of the bad

I have a thought for breakfast
And an anecdote for lunch
But I'm hungry for that feeling
That gives me this hunch
I am a messenger, my prophets by my side
I am a messenger, one with nothing to hide.

Rainbow connection

2009-09-30T00:36:00.000-07:00

Why is there a question to answer?
Everywhere I turn
Why is there an other side?
And why am I on this one?

Why is there a pot of gold
At the end of the rainbow
And why can't summer
Stay forever, you know..
Corn fields and daffodils
That's the dream
And ice cream and petty thrills
Me in between

Where's all the rain
And the pouring, and the pouring
Where's all the rain
That I keep ignoring

I'm stuck in this, rainbow connection
And it just won't let me be
I'm stuck in this, rainbow connection
This beautiful tragedy

Some day I'll wake up
And walk into this dream
Some day I'll be free
Some things I've wanted
Some things I haven't
But that's just me

Why is there a question to answer?
Everywhere I turn
Why is there an other side?
And why am I on this one?

The winds and the rains
They've spoken to me
Asked me about the matter
They've stayed for a chat
And talked about this and that
But more about the latter

I've sat by the sea
I've seen ships sail far away
I've seen the sea meet the ocean
I've seen the men kneel and pray
I've seen mountains and rainbows
Side by side, face to face
I've seen trees and breezes
In a warm embrace

Some day I'll wake up
And walk into this dream
And some day I'll be free
Some times I'm lonely
Some times if only
They'd let me be..

Some day I'll wake up
And see it as a dream
But before I lose it
Come share it with me.

I'm lucky to be lonely

2009-09-29T14:22:00.000-07:00

NOTE: Thanks Riz for the idea.

I'm lucky to be lonely
Cuz at least I ain't dead
I'm lucky to only..
Be alone instead

I'm lucky for a reason and some more
I'm lucky to be lonely, of course I'm sure

I may be lonely but I still see the sky
And I may be the only one not surprised
That I may be just one, I'm happy anywhoo
I'm lucky I'm alone and so, are you...

The morning paper's all mine and the coffee too
I'm happy I'm just one, so would you...
Close the door on your way out, please close the door
Cuz it's messing up my space and it's not, cool anymore...

The rain's pouring down and it feels just right
It's surprising it knows exactly where i seem to hide
And it's pouring til the sky's all clear
And it's pouring and I love it here
And it's pouring and the floor's all gone
And all I do is make this song.

Sand Castles in Tangerine Dreams

2009-07-16T11:18:00.000-07:00

I see visions of a future
Of a tomorrow lost in today
I see apparent peace and bliss
Content in itself, in every way

I come across a morning drift, like a lonely man
Like a mourning sift warning an only man
Like objective subjects and subjective objects
I have no idea what I just said except...

I see the full moon smiling at me
I feel the wind waving back
I see myself wishing the sun was there
But he's too busy hitting the sack

I see goodbyes and hello-hi's
All around me I see joy in disguise
I see harmony and peace and bliss
I see misfortune giving this a miss

I see Don Corleone with Wooten and Miller
In my head I see them chill
A glass of Macallan Single Highland Malt
Up atop the sunset streaked hill

I see smoke rings and sand castles
And smiles of tangerine dreams
I see myself smiling away like a jackass
Lost in a rainbow tinted stream

I see The King, Elvis, with B.B.King
Fighting over common last names, doing their thing
Michael screams as he walks on the moon
But he didn't come back and it ended too soon

I see a bird chirp
I feel the wind fight my accelerated trip
I see myself, with a blank flag
On the highest Mountain tip.

Memories in my pocket

2009-07-01T13:24:00.000-07:00

It all started with a single day
One that put a new world in place
One that brought out the thought in me
Bound together with eclectic grease

Brilliant. It's all brilliant.

Life's good.

I sit here typing after a sleepless night filled with volleyball, nicotine, a LOT of Marcus Miller, some sitcom dosage, and a lot of endless wishing in my mind. And now I have to get off my behind and go to a job that demands more responsibility than I have the capacity to give, and earns me more respect than I have the capacity to contain. After a life of bending to the rules and staying away from the grind, it seems as though I've finally joined the rat race after all. And it gets tougher and more demanding by the day. Lately I've gotten obsessed with volleyball, and The Beatles, and Marcus Miller. I've taken a liking to vegetarian food. I like the rain even more now. I hate the traffic. I love having the sun over my head as long as I'm wearing a helmet.

Worth it. All worth it.

When I sat down here to type all this, I thought I'd write a load of poetic riff raff that I could boast about to myself, but I guess I'm not really in the mood to listen to myself right now. But I don't really know. Pissing myself off would just mean that I'd end up doing the exact opposite of what I'm doing right now, which would take me to back to the original plan, and lead me to my being content anywho. Ah. The irony of it all.

I've got memories in my pocket
More than it can ever hold
And tales of conquests ordinary
They're bad, I'd get killed if I told

And poetic thoughts that I'd rather not share
Why? Because I don't have too many to spare
But I still have time, and yet some more
To talk and talk until I bore

I'm stuck
In a room full full of mirrors
And all I can see, are a million me's
One after another, one after another

I see them, they see me
I see them see me in infinity
When I smile, they smile
When I frown, they smile harder
The bastards!

Ok. Not my best work. But then again, I never promised anyone anything. But yeah, if you're reading this, and you know me in person, I know you're going to hit me later for boring you like this. Sigh.

I'm awesome. Oktakecarebye.

The New arrive...

2009-07-01T12:57:00.000-07:00

I haven't been updating this for a long time now, and I guess it's because of the job, and initially because of the book i was working on. I frankly have no idea about what I want to write here, there's just so much stuff I've kept bottled up inside my head that it's overwhelming.

Times have changed. I have changed. A lot has passed and gone by, and a lot has arrived. Former days of endless freedom of thought have gone and in their place I see days filled with creative satisfaction and progress. I never really thought I could fit anything in this little space, so I'm not going to bother, nor am I going to bore you to death.

Watch this space. I see a new wave coming.

Chapter n-draft 3

2009-03-01T11:02:00.000-08:00

NOTE: What you see below is an excerpt from a literary project, a WiP(Work in progress). It is a teaser of something i hope to complete by mid-2010. I will be updating info on this periodically, though not very often. If you've read this, and have any feedback/advice/opinions(good or bad), please feel free to let me know. Thanks for reading.

"Se réveiller."
(Wake up)

A voice echoed in a broken man's soul, and in his mind it resonated like wave of shattered emotion, gradually and progressively building up into a volatile outburst. It seemed to be getting closer, and he felt as though it was creeping up on him. He felt weak and powerless. Perhaps it was conscience calling for reason, a subtle reminder of all that had passed, and all that was yet to come. Or so he thought.

"Se réveiller, mon ami. Se réveiller."
(Wake up, my friend. Wake up)

The voice spoke yet again, and kept repeating itself. He shook it off with a jerk, only to feel its return the very next moment. Every night was the same now, a constant battle between between cognizance and unconsciousness. He felt as though he was trapped indecisively between the two, driven to one end of the spectrum only to be pulled back towards the other. The hallucinations were more frequent now, serving as constant reminders of his past, taking his mind to places and people he wished to forget and avoid. Memories and thoughts played back and forth in constant repetition in his head. It seemed as though they were a part of his conscience now, an amalgamation of fragments juxtaposed at the advent of every awakening, and at the departure of every stillness.

There was very little he could do, but a lot that he wanted to.

Krane Hawksworth felt a freezing chill run down his spine. Another nightmare had taken its toll on him yet again. He got up in a start, his heart beating at a rate faster than it could handle, pumping blood to his already stressed brain. He was gasping for air, and was still in shock from the harsh reality that unreal dreams delivered to him so voluntarily.

Through his bedroom window, he could see the cold moon looking down upon him from the stars, smiling, shining, its soothing light radiating away into the night sky, declaring to all a selfless embrace of universal harmony, reminding him of every moment that had just passed him by without a single word of farewell or a slight mention of remorse. For that one moment he felt free, he saw hope, but before he could grasp it for himself his mind switched back into first gear and ran over his illusion of freedom. And so he returned to where he had started from.

This was not how he intended things to turn out, this was not where he saw himself in life, and certainly not what he had imagined in his blissfully ignorant mind, completely oblivious to what fate had in store for him. The revelation he got now was not doing much to ease the agonizing pain either. He sighed as he glanced across the room, his eyes looking around mechanically, searching for one sign of divine intervention, one sign of an exit from this painfully repetitive monotony.

"Qu'est-ce que tu veux ?"
(What do you want?)

"Qu'est-ce que tu veux, vieux ami?"
(What do you want, old friend?)

The voice repeated itself, taunting him, mocking him, drawing him deeper towards insanity and delusion. He wished it would withdraw and take its departure, but it didn't. It stayed and tormented him, toying with every thought, every intuition. It seemed to make sense, but he wasn't really sure if it did. He wondered how long it would take before he went completely insane. He knew he was about to break, he just didn't know when it would happen.

"Qu'est-ce que tu veux!!!"
(What do you want!!!)

The voice was no longer hollow and faint. It seemed like it was coming closer, creeping up behind him, waiting, watching. What scared him the most was that despite knowing the fact that it wasn't real, he had no control over it. It seemed so real and true that it almost made sense. He wanted to ignore it, but he couldn't. It stayed and kept talking to him, demanding answers and explanations. He wondered if he was going insane, or if it was just hallucination overpowering reason .

He sat by the window, eyes weary, heart heavy, his mind filled with nebulous thoughts of doubt and apprehension that remained in constant collision with thoughts instigated and actualized by rationale and logic. He realized now that he had landed himself in a fabricated chimera of his mind, a chaotic delusion waiting to implode. He also realized that it had given him a splitting headache.

Outside the window, the world seemed unaware of his predicament, blissfully ignorant and content in its own current completion and fulfillment. He looked around the room and noticed a flickering light bulb in a corner, its isolated filament lost in its own glass vacuum, shining away with a blessed innocence, and the privilege of not knowing the fact that its fate was inevitable, that its fate was the same. One with an end.

He got up, and started walking towards the kitchen. He thought he could really with a hot cup of coffee after all he just went through. He thought it would help with the headache, and since he was already up, a little caffeine in his system wouldn't make much of a difference anyway. Countless nights of sleeplessness and repulsion had brought about a chain reaction that embedded itself in his every thought. Death seemed like a reasonable option. What he was waiting for was an invitation, an initiation that would push him forward and release him from this inertia. To life. To death. It didn't matter. He wanted an initiation. He believed in Karma, an in the amalgamated unison of faith in a higher power that governed the Universe, but at that point, they both seemed busy, so he decided to choose for himself. It was not his way of looking at things, he had always fought the odds, emerged victorious, stayed humble and loyal to his
motives and condescending achievements, which is exactly why all this seemed so strange and new and unfamiliar. His eyes traced the outline of the room he was in, searching for some source of preoccupation, some source of distraction. There was none.

The coffee was ready and done. He grabbed a cup from the shelf and poured the coffee in. He then dropped two cubes of sugar and just the right amount of milk. He liked his coffee rich, and sweet. But not too sweet. Across the floor, a little farther than a step, was a table. On one side he placed the cup of coffee. On the other, was a PPK, a single action pistol, a German fire arm that saw extensive service in the German government and military during World War II. It was a smaller version of the PP, and was made to fill the need for a compact concealable handgun used by undercover police officers. He had it from the days of war, and of all his weapons, this was his favorite. It was small, compact, and good enough to trust a life with. It was also his loyal friend, who always obeyed and held its own against most of his most dangerous foes. It would soon, perhaps, turn into one itself. And once again, it would do justice to it's role. It was a part of him now, and he felt that it deserved to take a part of him as well, if not all. He had to choose between the gun and the coffee. He wanted to drink the coffee and then go for the gun, but he was afraid that the caffeine would change his mind. A confusing decision in his final moment of truth was the last thing he was aiming for.

Armed, dispossessed, and suicidal was not how he thought he'd end up. And a steaming hot cup of refreshing coffee wasn't really helping in this situation either. There had to be a way, an answer, a solution, a second door. There had to be reason and sensibility. But all that didn't matter now.

The time had come. He had made up his mind. It was time. With one final thought of decision he reached forward and lifted it up. It was decided. There was no other alternative. And in a fraction of a second, he watched as he swallowed his pride and watched it all fade away...

The coffee was definitely better than the bullet.

"Le moment de l'action est venu...."
(The time for action is now....)
*****************************************************************
Chapter m:

He sat there, helpless and wounded, his hands held tight across his aching abdomen. He wondered as to how everything went wrong. Mistakes were a luxury that meant death. A luxury he could not afford. It had never occurred to him that all the time spent in calculation and execution had stealthily incorporated in itself a flaw so fickle that it now endangered his very life. And to think that he had imagined that this whole day would be the sort one would talk about to their grandchildren on a sunny summer morning in a rocking chair by the garden while sipping away on fresh lemonade topped with ice cubes in a shimmery glass, or like a bedtime story one makes up by the fireplace, a manipulated yet funny anecdote of a fleeting moment that reminds one of a superior entity's rather unpredictable sense of humor. Funny how exactly the opposite had to happen.

His insides hurt. His chest was now burning, and his inner being felt as though it would just give up and collapse at any moment. He tried to ignore the pain and get up. He was still his wearing favorite jacket, made from the best aniline finished leather in his day, hand-stitched to perfection by the best tailor in his neighborhood. He wore a shirt underneath, a pearl white which now turned red with blood. He was getting weaker with each passing moment and was having a tough time trying to stay conscious, which could fairly and justifiably be attributed to the unpleasant fall he had a while ago.

Still no sign of the guy who set this up. He was getting impatient. Back then, a few moments ago, he was armed and ready, it was all going so well, and then everything turned around. In a flash, he was tearing through the nearest window, falling straight down, two stories to the bottom. He was sure he would die, but this was a day that refused to go according to plan. He fell on the car's bonnet, and it did anything but break his fall. He tried getting up, but decided to wait instead. He was better off that way. He had cover, and considered it a good idea to lay low. Laying low at the moment meant staying alive. He didn't complain.

He heard footsteps in the distance. It took Hawksworth every ounce of strength he could concoct from his already battered body to get himself up. He saw a man walking away in the distance, and in the moonlight he could see the faint shape of what he knew was a barrel bolted on to a stock. Yes. A smile appears and takes shape on his scarred face, from the depths of his already twisted mind. Yes. It is who he thinks it is.

He reloads, takes a deep breath, and...

....x-x-to be contd

A tainted hollow...

2009-01-14T12:03:00.000-08:00

If you were a feather, I'd be a wing
If you were a tether, I'd be a ring
If you were a memory, I'd be the smile
If you were forever, then I'd be the while..

If I, told you, that I'll always be here
Would you tell me, to disappear?
If I chose to follow, would you lead the way?
If I was left behind, would you choose to stay?

This memory just seems to be a tainted hollow
Or could it be that all I see is a faint tomorrow?
How would I know this vertigo would bring me here?
Why won't you go and leave me alone to disappear?

These clouds of fear all seem so clear within these walls
Another tear seems to bring me near the final call
So mechanized I realized this dream so shallow
In celluloid I traumatized this heart shaped shadow

They twist and turn, and then they burn, like sticks on fire
Oh how they yearn, when will they learn, to retire?
The pain it pours to something more than just a story
An eagle soars towards the shore to seek its glory

I've missed to see this memory lost out to the past
This irony so incomplete like shattered glass
Like cotton clouds rising out with the winds
This tainted shroud shouts aloud with the memory it brings...

This little soul just lost control over this momentary bliss
This rock n roll of real old feels just like this
Now all i need is one eternity to feel this sure
Oh so complete this melody just feels so pure

Dream on..

2008-12-19T07:13:00.000-08:00

She listened to the clouds over the rain
And she thought she heard them say
Another line of grace
Mellowed all the way
Crying in the storm
Where the children played
She watched with a frown
Hoping it'd all change..

And then summer came
Bringing all the sun
A revolution of sun-soaked bliss
Had already begun..
A peppermint glow on the white-washed snow
And sunny sides on the emerald green
God painted all this here, with a shade of heaven
He painted dreams, right in between

Oh how i wish this dream would stay
And consciousness would just stay away
For just a while, if not more
I wish to dream, but I'm just not sure

Absence makes the heart grow fonder.

2008-12-04T05:39:00.000-08:00

No. Not really.. no. I can name a LOT of things that went 'absent' during my course of life, and no, my heart did not grow 'fonder'. Like for instance, the chicken pox i got in 4th grade... forgot all about it. Or the yearly fever. I try to forget it like the plague. Or the dreaded 'common' cold. I'd wish it really wasn't really that common. In my defense to the argument that I have self-created against this common proverb, I only want to say that we should really stop saying things which are applicable and progressive only when we bent it over and well.. 'adjust and adapt' to the situation at hand.

Person A: God, my fever's finally gone.
Person B: Yup. Bugged ya for a whole 3 days. But it's gone now, POOF, gone, 'ABSENT'..
Person A: Yup. 'Absence does makes the heart grow fonder'. Now that I think about it, i do miss my allergy, my fevers, colds, the mumps, diarrhea, stomach ulcers, internal bleeding.. and.. ooo ooo ooo, my favorite... constipation!!
Person B: God, you are one lucky dude... holding on to such fond memories.
Me: Er.. Waiter.. Excuse me.. I am in no way associated with these idiots, so do you think I could possibly get another table please, preferably as far away as possible, like the one over there, that's nice, it's got the maximum radius of sensibility i think, and can you charge them for their stuff? And while you're at it, could you pop in a laxative or two in their drinks? Yes. Yes I'll pay for that..

Observe please..

2008-12-03T14:12:00.000-08:00

01 - Cabbages are balls of leaves.

02 - People who crib about not hanging out in cool places need a bigger fridge.

03 - I have super-natural memory , I just keep forgetting that.

04 - A terrorist is a guy with ideas so BAD, they hurt people.

05 - The Pine-Apple, and Sweet-Potato were adopted. Thats why they don't 'fit in'.

06 - A watch has 3 hands. Nothing anywhere else does. Handy.

07 - I have an amazing biological clock. It's tuned to the neighbouring continent, runs in slow motion, and at times, mimics a dead walnut.

08 - If I had a billion dollars, and I spent a dollar, I'd be a millionaire.

09 - A fly flies and a flea flees. They don't know that they do do what they'r called. We need more originality in the entomological naming division.

10 - If cough syrups and cold syrups cure coughs and colds, why do we have maple syrups and sugar syrups?

11 - Most of the superheroes with partially covered face masks never ever grow a beard.

Ironically, Batman would look more authentic as a bat IF he stopped shaving. But that might

look wierd, so I didn't tell anyone.

12 - I've been around people who are in LOVE with the concept of eternal optimism, and LOVE,

and the WONDERFUL blessed goodness all around them but eventually, I grew a tolerance.

13 - You can change the entire world; with only 8 shots of vodka, or a medium-sized bottle of rum.

Well, most of the time anyway..

14 - The eternal question: What is the purpose of life?

The answer: To live.

We all assume and acknowledge the fact that life eternal has a purpose. Nope. It doesn't. Sorry. Because if it did, that'd make it... BORING.

15 - Cockroaches are annoying. And it turns out they haven't changed biologically for millions of years. That means they hung out even when there were dinosaurs. But when you think about it, them dinosaurs didn't have to try real hard to stamp the critters. That's cuz they walked everywhere, and there no fridges at the time for the roaches to hide behind.

16 - Pepsi and coke are black in colour, until there's very little. Thats when it turns reddish brown caramel in colour. That, is wierd. And scary. I need better things to do in life than this...

17 - It takes a lot to get me drunk. No matter how much I drink, I somehow always manage to walk in a straight Zig-zag.

18 - I just realized that I'm not a page-3 celebrity. I am, however, the awesome dude you read about in page 30.

19 - A wise guy once sad, "hard work and dedication are the pillars of success". That guy died though. The pillars fell on him.

A penny for your thoughts

2008-12-03T14:09:00.004-08:00

If Jill comes up to Jack and tells him that, and if he says a 100 thoughts, is he technically supposed to get a whole dollar? Does that make him legally and legitimately eligible to claim an entire standard unit of American currency? Can Jack take legal action against Jill if he doesn't get his dollar? And suppose we take into account that neither Jill or Jack are American, does the entire statement turn null and void in that sense, and if it does, doesn't that mean it's racist? What then is Jack supposed to do when Jill does not give him his one dollar? Also, lets take into account that Jack is not smart enough to elucidate a whole 100 thoughts at once. Does he get some sort of installment plan or some sort of mutual understanding where a recording of his thoughts is made so that he can claim his dollar once he touches a hundred. And what if he only needs 50 cents? What if while expressing his thoughts, Jill suddenly remembers that she has thoughts as well, and starts expressing them to jack, what were to happen then? Would it be technically right to take number of Jack's thoughts and procure the difference between their thought by subtracting that figure with the number of thoughts that Jill has to express? Or else, since Jill is the only one who said the damn line, shouldn't Jack be un-eligible to claim any stakes on the offer? Will Jill agree to his demands? And why is Jack such a stingy prick anyway? One more thing, since it's inflation season, shouldn't Jill say "A nickel for your thoughts" instead of the penny dialogue. This disturbs me. Why is Jill such a cheap bitch anyway, and who gave her the right to decide if it's supposed to be a penny or a nickel without consulting a trained trade analyst, or even without taking the consent of a veteran specialist economist?

Now,.. I'm really glad they fell off that hill...

Practice makes perfect

2008-12-03T14:09:00.003-08:00

Bullshit. It is a meaningless fcking saying. It is just that. A saying, not a doing, because a doing is not a saying. It does not hold true except for boring activities or messed up elitist desires or personal obsessions. I would not get anywhere in life if I was merely practicing what I was supposed to do. I get paid to do my job, to work, not to practice and implement the phenomenon of 'Trial and Error' and test the correctness and the presence of probability in my daily life. If that ws true, I would only practice all day without doing a God-damned thing. Take for instance the fact that I've been practicing to look good for years, and all I have is a bad jaw and a lot of pointing fingers. Why do these bogus sayings not have a hyphen at the end followed by the name of the idiot that made them? Does the judicial system of the world we live in enable us to sue the dumb bloke who made them? And while we're at it, can we also add the tiny observation that if it is untrue, then a lot of children out there are going to have their hearts broken? Thats accounts for a lot of mental harrassment and torture, so in short this guy who's going around making bogus sayings should be put behind bars where he's forced to study and correct the grammatical errors of his ways so that the world may be at a better place.

What's up?

2008-12-03T14:09:00.001-08:00

One more rotten apple. I can understand that this serves as nothing more than a conversation starter, but come on.. I would really like to hear one logical and reasonably appropiate answer, only one, out of the tens of twenties that i get to hear to that miserable question every day. What's up? I have no fcking clue... And don't bloody ask me what is up because i had nothing to do with it. If you think about it, YOU were the one who asked the question, YOU were the one who's interested in knowing if i know what is up, and YOU were the one who knew that it was up there in the first place. This could only mean that YOU were the fcking moron who was dumb enough to lose something up there and go around asking for it like a fool, so unless you mend the errors of your ways, i suggest you stay away from me you half-baked lunatic!!

And it doesn't end there. We, as socially active organisms tend to 'bend and modify' things according to our whims and fancies without giving any thought or careful consideration to the deliberate influence of our actions. I regret to inform you, that "What's up" is no longer with us, and died a sudden and painful death as and when "Sup" came around the corner with his low waist denims, smoking a pipe full of pot and sporting a neck with enough bling bling to make sure his ugly mug was no longer visible.

Random Person A: What's up man?

Me: Er..

Random Person A: You okay bro? So what's up?

Me: Nothing much.

Random Person A: That's awesome man. I got nothing much up there as well..

Me: Get the fck away from me!!

Don't count your chickens before they hatch

2008-12-03T14:05:00.000-08:00

BAD IDEA!! I will not count, and I will definitely not count chickens.. I takes too long. I would much rather sit under the sun with a vodka laced glass of lemonade and let the chickens count each other. That way, they get to learn basic arithmetic as well... Will help in counting their eggs, and therefore help in effective family planning, and leave me and my lemonade in peace. Besides, I don't have any chickens. However, if you really think and feel it necessary to do so, feel free to go ahead and count your chickens. You can try, and if at first you don't succeed..

Get new batteries.

Look out!!

2008-11-25T08:48:00.000-08:00

I had a thought. And in that thought I saw an idea. An idea that led me across a golden path laced with the light of a thousand dreams. A possibility that I am getting closer to all that I seek. Closer to being complete. Being free. Set apart from the distant breeze that help me rise up into the clouds, clouds of curiosity that have followed me ever since I swerved around the corner.

I sit here, and connect the dots with a permanent marker. The darkness is getting weaker, and it's time for the sun to shine yet again. The light is blinding, but I'm looking the other way, because there on the other end, is my window to the real world.

So...

What are you looking away from, to look towards?

The veteran returns...

2008-10-19T21:32:00.000-07:00

I remember now a man cloaked in black

Among the shadows I knew not who he was

As night approached he came along the path

But it was not as if it was because..

His eyes talked of tomorrow

Though he came from yesterday

Finding shade in the shadows

He kept movin on his way..

He didn't talk much and his words were few

Of emotions lost in the dust for directions new

And then he talked and talked

Of a Holy War he had won

In days gone by, gone past

In a time where all was one

He wore a hat with a tilt

And a smile with a guilt

The loss of his time

Seemed to take it's toll..

And then he spoke away

With an air of grey

And talked about the war

That consumed the earth whole..

He told his story, and this is how it went..

I was but a simple man

And I had gardens so green

Under the skies, back then so blue

The bluest I'd ever seen

The rivers and lakes ran pure

Without a fear they flowed with glee

And the winds watched them

As they flew into the sea..

My world was my Eden

And my home was all I had

It was my small share of heaven

The best heaven I'd ever had

And when the sun crept away

To make way for the stars and the moon

I'd never have expected this course

To end and break so soon..

Beyond the horizon, beyond the emerald trees

Was a plague of chaos and greed, drawing near

The skies grew darker and the joy paled away

Demons sent their regards, laced with fear

The Holy War had begun.

The women and children, we sent them away

And set out to war, that very day

We fought with our blood, and our tears of fear

For we knew, we just might lose everything dear

Swords met swords, and metal embraced metal

Many fell, while many returned, to Hell

I see them in my dreams now

My brothers in arms, and their cries of pain

My dreams taunt me and haunt me now,

They try to drive me insane

And in those dreams, I see my humble home

And the garden where the children play

I see their mother watch over them

I see it, like I see yesterday..

We won the war, but we lost the world we had

We lost the times of joy, and the peace in the land

For a thousand weeks, every day and every night

We fought the darkness, in search of the light

And now it is over, the darkness has passed

The skies are blue and grasses green, at last

It has ended now, the war is no more

There is no more blood, there is no more gore

I'm going home to see my children now

And my wife who waits for me

But even now I think about the coincidence

The irony that all those demons, looked just like me...

We didn't create war.

We perfected it.

WHY SO SERIOUS?!

2008-10-13T15:17:00.000-07:00

Note: Thanks for the inputs Zubair!

Welly, welly, welly, welly, welly, welly, well. To what do I owe the extreme pleasure of this surprising visit? Now that you're here, you might as well sit back and listen, you wouldn't be here if you didn't care to listen now, would you? What's it going to be then, eh?

why so serious?

is it because you feel that you are flawed? that the simple line that divides your life from your demise is simply that, a simple line? sad realization, not that it helps, ya know, and a very poor choice of words to define this, this.. continuum if you ask me, ya know, but then again...

it's all part of the plan.

the only thing is, you can't do anything about it, no matter how hard you try or try or even try harder, it's pointless ya see, YOU know you're gonna break at some point, everyone does, and that's what you're so afraid of. And ya know what's scarier and what makes it even more fun than it already is?

you won't know when it'll hit you.

do you really think you can make a difference, that you're little "plans" and group therapy sessions in broad daylight can in any tiny way influence the happenings in the dark night? that's nice.. atleast u got a thing going on there.. but you see.. that's the point thats pointless... there is no point in chasing a car if you're just a dog who likes to do just that, chase cars..

you wouldn't know what to do with it.

you see, initiative comes to thems that wait. and i'm not very good at that. look.. does God want goodness or the choice of goodness? is a man who chooses to be bad perhaps in some way better than a man who has the good imposed upon him? when a man cannot choose, he ceases to be a man.

what if you did this.. jus think about it... you steal a lollypop from a kid, and then you show it to him and pretend to give it back, but you don't, see... you break it and then watch him break, but you don't let him break either, see... you fix it back and you give it to him, and this time, you throw it away and tell him that he deserved better than what he had. and once this little dandy plan is done, you think about your actions, and the actions behind your actions, and you think about the reasons and motives and thoughts and purposes and every other details in your perfect little 'plan', about the taking and the faking, and the stealing and the revealing, and think and think and think why o why o why!

what you will feel and experience then will be the scariest and darkest experience you'd have ever wanted to cross lines with, it will break you and take you, one block at a time, and by the time it's all over, you'll crumble and fall like a stack of rotten christmas cookies. it's pure chaos, and you know the thing about chaos..

it's bare.

A prayer to the Lord of Ha-ha's

2008-10-08T10:46:00.000-07:00

Hope on board Laydees and gentullmens. I think we're in for a bad spell of wether anyway, but don't worry no mind. Get it?? No?? Good...

Oh Lord..

Let there be an air of humor all around me, so that I may be more humorous without even trying. Bless those who smile and laugh with me, and castigate those who don't, to frequent trips to the local dictionary. Let there be a smile, in place of a frown, even when petty irritations like elusive success plague their minds, and failure prohibits them from passing by your groovy trip of joy(Oh shut up you) .

Let Pac-man defeat all those ghosts over and over, let there be awareness of the fact that more often than not, we tend to overlook life's simple pleasures. We tend to forget that when someone annoys us, it takes 42 muscles in our face to frown, but only 4 muscles to extend our arms and b*tch-slap that moron upside the head.

Let there be an ignorance to inflation and singlenessness, and being broke or unpopular, let there be music and art, and the flow of creative thought wherever I may be, let there be open minds and an end to that irritating feminisim and chauvinism crap.Pliss pliss pliss lift the smoking ban where I live, or atleast give me a sign, give me a sign as to where those friggin smoking zones are, and let there be free entry there, and and and, and last of all, let there be no powercuts during downloads.

Amen.

The Doubt of Reason

2008-09-26T14:41:00.000-07:00

A universe embedded in a grain of sand

Two dots in a world free from 'or' and 'and'

Like drops of water in crystalline dew

Fools like these are but a few

Of 1 and 1, that made a 2

A nut and a cherry, dipped in blue.

For there was one, and there was one

And 'part from this, there were none

A trip of two, in a million words

Through good and bad and even worse

Through smirks and smiles and smiles galore

This tale is a little less than more

A tale without purpose, but with a name

One with sense, all the same

T'is like this, think light and shade

T'is like neon on two cards of spade

One a joker, and one a queen

And a covalent bond, in between.

One followed a voice, the other, life

Connect dots these with the edge of a knife

For when you do you see crystal clear

One's thoughts in the other in a mirror near

Augmented, suspended, like major and minor

Made at peace by a dream designer.

Like rum and gin, shaken not stirred

And a dash of lemon most preferred

A little fizz, and a stream of lime

But that's a tale for some other time

Like midnight scotch, drunken pure

I think it is but I'm quite unsure.

So on we go, with our tale of tales

One so intriguing it never fails

So sit back and listen, O reader true

Don't you wish that it was you

A joker sly or a crazy queen

Connecting the dots in between.

Who they are I cannot reveal

But I will so read on without a squeal

The joker was sly but not as such

The queen was pretty and sweet as much

Two cool cats, cool as can be

A tale of groovesome 2, Fizzy the joker and T the queen.

In the Land of Dreams was a Tree of Gold

The kind in legends truth be told

And sat upon the branch touching the sky

Was the joker head held high

Sat he up there and gazed all day

At summer sun, radiating away.

The joker lived an architectured dream

With notes and strings in between

And heard he not the sounds of this space

For the mad hatter was in another place

Contented he was as he played away

And soon passed by the queen of spade.

And there she was, on the endless greens

Walking towards the Holy Tree

From far away far she saw a figure black

That looked like bones and a hat

Strange t'was that the Holy Tree

Would behold such a sight to see.

Lost he was, in his world of rhyme

Obsessed he was at that blessed time

He played and played without a gap

And then decided to take a nap

But then, the queen he saw sitting under the tree

So down jumped he floating with the breeze.

Wrapped in a coat velvet black

Smiling glee with a tilted hat

And a frame built so tall and thin

It hid world of thought within

Looked he at her with a curious stare

A slender thing with pretty hair.

Then came along, the Wind of Time

And with it carried a merry rhyme

And the birds and bees sang they along

Adding melody to the Holy Song

And the joker and queen, listened they

To what the winds and creatures, had to say.

And as sang they, the joker played along

Until the wind went by and then had gone

And then the breeze took its place

But it was calm, with nothing to say

With no distraction, he turned around

And asked the queen why she came about.

And so she spoke with a smile

Of questions unanswered all the while

She spoke of reason, and the purpose of all

Why some would rise and some would fall

And all the while the joker thought

Of his contribution own to the plot.

So sat the joker and scratched his chin

And listened to the little thing

And liked he did the ? thoughts

Another reason to connect the dots

Then laughed the joker when she was done

Another conversation, had begun...

And so sat they and pondered upon

The Doubt of Reason from dusk til dawn

And as they did, cracked the joker a riddle

That made the queen jump up from her twiddle

If must you know I tell to you

A twiddle is what a twiddle does true.

The queen sat puzzled and drew a ? look

And up jumped the joker with The Holy Book

And tried the queen to clear her doubt

But knew she not what the script was about

With dots and dots, and many a line

The Book it seemed was from another time.

She sat and thought, of what it was

She wanted to know, the 'why' and 'because'

Then laughed the joker, as he tilted his hat

With a rakish tilt, sense made he of this and that

He told the queen, with a contented look

What he saw and read in the book.

He spoke of the Doubt of Reason, and spoke he fair

He told her how The Book knew it was there

And how The Holy Book of Notes explained

Of why The Doubt of Reason still remained

And soon she saw, clear as the sky

The Book was the answer to all our lies.

Then smile did she at the Joker's eyes

For there she saw her answer wise

The Doubt of Reason, was a doubt no more

T'was merely a groove in 4/4

And so sat they and pondered on

And disappeared, into sunset dawn...

I Am My Own Grandpa (By Molly Ellis)

2008-09-24T09:32:00.000-07:00

Many, many years ago
When I was twenty-three
I got married to a widow
Pretty as could be.

This widow had a grow-up daughter
With flowing hair of red.
My father fell in love with her,
And soon the two were wed.

This made my dad my son-in-law
And changed my very life.
Now my daughter was my mother,
For she was my father's wife.

To complicate the matters worse,
Although it brought me joy,
I soon became the father
Of a bouncing baby boy.

My little baby then became
A brother-in-law to dad.
And so became my uncle,
Though it made me very sad.

For if he was my uncle,
Then that also made him brother
To the widow's grown-up daughter
Who, of course, was my step-mother.

Father's wife then had a son
Who kept them on the run.
And he became my grandson,
For he was my daughter's son.

My wife is now my mother's mother
And it makes me blue.
Because, although she is my wife,
She's my grandma, too.

If my wife is my grandmother,
Then I am her grandchild.
And every time I think of it,
It simply drives me wild.

For now I have become
The strangest case you ever saw,
As the husband of my grandmother,
I am my own grandpa!

-Molly Ellis

Wisdom is a boomerang.

2008-09-19T16:21:00.000-07:00

Don't talk about the sea with the frog in a well, for its habitation is confined;
Don't talk about the ice with the bug that only lives in the summer, for its time is confined;
Don't talk about Tao with a country folk, for his education is confined. -Chuang-Tze, chapter 17

It is not ironic or even out of place to start a conversation on wisdom with a quote built on the Tao, however, it is said, that only greatness itself can define greatness. Wisdom was never discovered, it was always there, always present, always obvious, a few among a few paused to see it. I, am not among those few. I don't care.

There is no life, just an illusion of impeding death, and an apparent succeeding afterlife after that. The way is not in the sky, the way is in the heart, in the soul, in the mind, in the shadow hiding from the light. We have nothing as proof, as evidence, only words in books written by others who've pondered upon or stumbled upon.. ideas, visions, imaginations, theories, ideologies, assumptions, and even misconceptions.

Better than a thousand hollow words, is one word that brings peace. It is like the relation between good and evil. There has to be evil so that good can prove its purity above it. All things appear and disappear because of the concurrence of causes and conditions. Nothing ever exists entirely alone; everything is in relation to everything else.

I have felt a second dimension. A second realm. In a normal person's perception, even I would deem it as insanity. But the sane can only go so far in this mortality, in this reality, in this plastic box of life tagged with an expiration date. Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one. Any intelligent fool can make things bigger, more complex, and more violent. It takes a touch of genius, and a lot of courage, to move in the opposite direction. Many disagree. I do not care.

I have felt an elevated state of (un?)consciousness. I have seen things half-asleep that I would never hope to in any state of mind that could be called, er, normal I suppose. No, I'm not on any narcotic, or alcohol, and I can't afford ecstasy. I'm just lame, and even lamer to write about it. I am constantly observing, never doing mind you, only observing with BIG gaping eyes, watching, questioning, and the only thing that interferes with my learning, is my education. Education, is what remains after one has forgotten everything he learned in school. It is what keeps you questioning, it is what keeps you curious when you fail to answer. The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing.

Take this doubt for instance..
Gravitation is responsible for a falling stone, a falling rain drop, a falling rock, a falling 10-ton truck. However, gravitation is not responsible for a heart falling in love. There is a lot of hypocracy, mediocrity and veracity in everything. But that's not what I'm searching for.

I want to know God's thoughts; the rest are details.

Note:
Everything in the above that is either in italic or in bold font is a quote. I did not write those words. I can't write, and I don't know what wisdom is. So don't think otherwise. Thank you for reading, if you did. :D

Tales of Orange I - An intro...

2008-09-06T09:13:00.000-07:00

My pet human is so excessively ignorant and self-centered that in all his tales here on this blog he has not once mentioned me or the important part I played in his life. Me writing from here in Heaven is just a lame excuse to cover up his negligence. He calls me Orange, the lazy slob, though I better it would be far more appropriate to introduce myself as His Highness Edward III. This is however, my name to humans, since you folks can't pronounce my feline name.

At home, I was merely called Orange.. what kind of a messed up individual would call a cat Orange... it is highly degrading, which is why I would reciprocate this injustice by eating the Banana Walnut cake that he would get to eat. Muahakhakhakha... *cough cough*

Sorry. Fur-ball.

There is lots that I have to say, but I thought a quick intro and a hi and a hello should do for now. I will return with more tales and memories.

Till then, stay Orange.

To be continued...

Inside Pavlov's head...

2008-09-05T15:26:00.000-07:00

A friend of mine told me this long ago, and provoked my curiosity about this whole thing. Another friend asked me what it was, and I shrugged at the opportunity to explain. Well, better late than never...

This is the story of a dog, whose owner went by the names of Ivan Petrovich Pavlov, used to explain the phenomenon of Classical Conditioning, which involves the association of a neutral stimulus, that is, presenting a favoured and anticipated action and connecting it with an induced stimulus, which is what triggers a reflex mechanism in the brain. By associating the two, Pavlov discovered that it was possible to connect the dots between the two.

Confused? So am I, so I'll explain...

Who was Ivan Pavlov?
The Russian scientist Ivan Petrovich Pavlov was born in 1849 in Ryazan, where his father worked as a village priest. In 1870 Ivan Pavlov abandoned the religious career for which he had been preparing, and instead went into science. There he had a great impact on the field of physiology by studying the mechanisms underlying the digestive system in mammals.
For his original work in this field of research, Pavlov was awarded the Nobel Prize in Physiology or Medicine in 1904. By then he had turned to studying the laws on the formation of conditioned reflexes, a topic on which he worked until his death in 1936. His discoveries in this field paved the way for an objective science of behavior.
- From http://nobelprize.org/

***

While Pavlov was studying the secrets of the digestive system, he stumbled upon a little fact. He discovered that dogs by reflex started drooling whenever presented with food. In complex terminology, he found that when a dog encounters food, saliva starts to pour from the salivary glands located in the back of its oral cavity. However, he also noticed that the dog drooled without any proper stimulus.

Dogs drool when there is food around. But Pavlov noticed that his dogs drooled even when there was no food around. The reason? Lab coats. It turned out the the person feeding the dogs always wore a lab coat when he did so, and so whenever the dogs came across a lab coat, they figured that food was on the way. Pavlov didn't giggle at the irony of the fact and walk away. He instead chose to study it further, and the following is what he discovered...

Pavlov started to associate the relation between lab coats and food, and started experimenting with other forms of stimuli. He rang a bell whenever the dogs were fed food. Soon enough the dogs associated the food with the ringing bell, and in a span of time, would start drooling when the bell was rung, and no food was around. Subconsciously, the doggy brains would react to the bell just as they would react to food. Dogs are nice creatures. They scare me to death, but then again, so does Britney Spears, so it's ok. I don't have any dislike for their species, just fear. So sue me. My cousin has this friend who has a black puppy called Patch, perhaps the only dog that runs after me without a murderous intent.

^Patch

Try this. Listen to your favorite song while doing math or studying physics. Do it for a few days, and leave it at that. You will notice that after that period of time, whenever you listen to your favorite song, you either feel like you want to study, or just feel like you already are. I've noticed this, because I've been doing something similar without even knowing it was physiologically theoretical stuff. I noticed that I always studied in the night, especially with this Iron Maiden tape I had long ago. I would get really pepped up and would really like studying when I heard that tape. One articular number in the tape (No more lies), is a song that ironically used to be playing whenever my kid brother would wake me up. This happened thrice. I would wake up with that song, and after that, whenever I would hear that song, I'd feel terribly lazy and soon enough, very sleepy.

I can go on and on, but my aim in this post was not to explain psychoanalytical theory, but to grab your interest, get you a little curious, and then, to let you discover for yourself what this is all about, but I'm guessing you got the basic idea in Pavlov's head by now. There's a lot more out there, and I'll let you discover it for yourself..

If you want, you can read up on Fear Conditioning, Behaviorism, Quantitative Analysis of Behavior et all. The net's got it all.

Happy searching.

Groovy Reasoning : The Advent of The Second Groove

2008-09-04T15:11:00.000-07:00

Have you ever wondered what it would be like to experience a state of spiritual freedom and bliss? What is it that provokes us to taunt the known and set out in the search of someplace so ethereal that this very world pales in comparison? I have often wondered what it would be like to open up a second world, a second door that lies hidden beside the first that is thrust upon us, a second option, a second chance...

The Second Groove. I'm bad with psychoanalytic terminologies, and my vocabulary isn't really what you'd call verbose, so I made up my own term for the feeling, the thought, the idea, and the experience, that, I like to call, My Second Groove.

In short, I like to think that our first groove is what we consciously experience, what ticks our clock, what winds our coils every morning, and what fuels our daily existence. But then again, the same old same would make life very trite, boring and UNentertaining wouldn't it? Come on now, stop giving me that apprehensive look and admit it, you too have experienced your very own Second Groove. Only problem is, you don't know what I'm talkin about because I made my own name for it. Big deal...

Among the stars, I sit and see
Days turn night in memory
And as I sit and wish for more
I cannot help, but explore

In my little corner in the dark
I yearn for peace, topped with bliss
And for a change, and thoughts of joy
That I could forever miss

And as I sit, and think of time
The voices they echo, the words they rhyme
I call upon, my second groove
To teach me to forever shine...

There are times when you are yourself, and there are times when you don't know who you are... It is at times like this when you can estimate the possibility of the existence of a second force backing you up, a mysterious thing that enables you to peek outside your shell, to push and exert yourself that one extra step, that one extra leap...

That, is what I call The Second Groove.

Have you ever wondered how you're sober all day, and turn into this psycho goofball all of a sudden? It's like this, the Second Groove kicks in either when you are in a state of extreme pressure, or extreme comfort. It is what makes me wake up in the middle of the night to write stuff like this, it is what made me clear engineering somehow, it is what makes me think about music all day long, it is what differentiates me from the boring conscious being that I am. I've noticed it kicked in with much larger fervor around a few people who have become part of my daily everythings and nothings.

I've noticed that when I'm around certain people, my second groove kicks in at Godspeed. The Orion's Belt. Praneeth, my brother from 6 long years, I manage to do the stupidest things ever, and yet manage to make them seem funny and intentional. It is when we chill out that I like cruising around in a car, which I'm not normally fond of(Cars and me are a bad equation), but that equation bites the dust with this brother around. The second 'third' of the belt would have to be Z, whom I can somehow converse philosophically around, and even counter-philosophize, if that makes any sense. He is also my backdoor into the world of piracy and techo thingamajigs.. Others would include Rebel(a kid who will make it big some day, and whom i call a kid at every opportunity while I still can) who somehow reminds me of myself and my own reflected yesterday. And then there's the Drunken Quartet: Abdul, Me, Pranab, and Rajni. Old friends who remain old friends,who've been there and watched my back in my worst times. Then there's Ridhee, who is this awesome girl who's one of the best thing to ever happen to me, one of the coolest friends ever, and the only one who did not kill me for spending cash on Pineapple Juice in a bar.. and Aahana, who I think is the only female in the world who actually tolerated all the khattas I came up with and did not kill me... yet. And, would chill out at midnight smoking Blacks by the side of the road, would hand me her Blueberry cheesecake in exchange for my Oreo Shake, and would have the inside scoop on whatever was going through my head.

The Second Groove, however, deserts me shamelessly around my Dad, or around hot chicks. But then again, it's never too late for an upgrade...

Think about that. And groove on...

A brobdingnagian enigma..

2008-08-31T06:59:00.000-07:00

I see summer sun,
In ginger skies,
Reflected, I see it,
In her auburn eyes.
It smiled at her,
And she smiled back,
The girl I call,
The Curious Cat.

High above the castle's clouds,
Sitting oh so free,
Sat a pretty girl ,
Made of tangerine.
Elevated, levitated,
With wings of cotton and more,
Escalating away on a mirror to the moon,
With a heart of golden core.

And so I met a girl,
A pretty one,
Eating strawberry ice-cream,
Under the sun.
And as she smiled,
The sun smiled back,
Bringing down a thousand rays,
And that was that..

And so I met, a pretty girl..
Who thinks more than I do,
And calls me smart instead ,
And confuses me ,
Every time I use my head.
Who questions my questions,
And answers them too,
A pretty girl,
Within the blue...

She LOL's a lot,
And Hehe's too,
Pretty little thing,
Fallen outta the blue.
Catches me off guard,
And runs me over,
With her NAYs and her AYs,
I remember the girl,
Whose auburn eyes,
Made my day.

I met a girl,
And shared my dream,
Of harmony and bass,
And as I talked,
She sat and heard,
All my words in place.
And as I talked,
About dreams and fears,
She heard it all,
So crystal clear.

She hates the fact,
That I eat chicken,
And wishes instead that I ate cheese in it's place,
'But then again', I'd tell her,
'All that's for folks,
From outer space'.
But I don't,
Because I do not want,
A broken face.

She says that I'm funny,
And I wonder why,
And she knows more than me,
About the stuff that I write.
She remembers things,
And I can't help but forget,
But I still remember
The nice girl who bought me coffee instead.

Walk along with me,
Because I cannot fly with you,
Without a spell,
I can only read the cosmic code of groove,
Of which I cannot tell.

Complicated you are,
But still as simple,
And truth can be told,
And yet so surprising,
So mesmerizing,
Like a Xmas present yet to unfold.
And if you sit,
And try to fit the pieces together,
You'll end up like the stupid rooster,
Who crash-landed without feathers.

I am but a forgetful monk,
Without a beard and words so wise,
But that I need not have to be,
To see purity in your eyes.
You shaken and stirred,
With rum and gin, and scotch from the bay
And company is company,
So I think I'll share mine today.

I talked to an angel,
And she sat and heard,
Words of wisDumb,
From the musical nerd.
I cannot describe her,
And what she means to me,
Limitations of a limited poetic,
That are meant to be.

And yet I try,
Her smile is worth the type,
Like front-page news,
That is worth the hype,
A brobdingnagian enigma,
Or a tritone paradiddle,
A euphoric sigma,
Or a crossword-ed riddle.

Objectivism she knows,
But Pavlovian is my way,
And yet somewhere across the horizon,
Her idea comes into play.
The curious cat,
Without a bell,
With questions to ask,
And stories to tell.

Interesting,
Yet full of surprise,
Like the moon in the middle,
Within neon-like skies.
Like a polychromatic collage,
With every color for the eye,
Well placed on the canvas,
Like stars in the sky.

One who shares,
Thoughts and dreams,
And fear and sorrow,
With joy in between.
One who I like listening to,
Without falling asleep,
Like a walk on sunset strip,
Through peppermint street.

A melody without silence,
The trident of peace,
With no room for sorrow,
Or explanations underneath.
And I'm afraid, I can't buy you bling and bling
But I can lend a shoulder, a tear and a smile,
But I can crack a funny jest, a quip if you will,
And along, the infinite while.

And so listen pretty one,
To the bassist worth a dime,
And read these lines,
Just one last rhyme..
A prayer,
A wish,
And a promise I stole,
From the sands of time...

Let the sun break through the clouds,
Just as you break through your doubt,
And may you shine, O crystalline diamond,
And may you blind all those about.
And may your joy arrive this very day,
And may your sorrows burn away into tomorrow,
May you find solace and peace in every moment,
And may all your pain turn hollow.
May misfortune forget, to knock on your door,
May fortune take its place,
May you be filthy rich, and some more,
May you remember to buy me, that bad-ass bass.!!

This goes out to the pretty girl next door,
You know who you are,
A pretty dream I come across when I'm awake,
So close, and yet so far...

No strings attached...

2008-08-25T06:32:00.000-07:00

The best part of being a musician, or even playing music is that there are no strings attached(metaphorically speaking).

I picked up my bass today after 3 weeks of shameless ignorance, due to the wear and tear I had to go through because of the daily grind. She forgave me, and we lifted off right where we last left off. No awkward silences, no uneasy situations, no reasons and explanations. Just the wonderful amalgamation of tones and silence. Nothing to express but emotion. It is funny how even the most awkward tonal changes seem to make sense as you start getting better, and as you start getting better, that is the last thing on your mind that you'd care about. How good or bad you are...

It's nice. That selfless connection one shares with his strings.., they don't care about who we care, they dont complain, they don't ask for any more or less than we can give them... And yet here I am, playing away... Nothing seems to matter in those five minutes of musical glory that I lock myself in... In those 5 minutes, I am immortal, i am free, i see new dimensions, new sides to the same old coin... I am exposed to the world beyond this world, exposed to the first step on the stairway that leads to heaven, a state of spiritual bliss that I cannot express here. I don't need to. Music is not something that can be described in words, not something that can be expressed or explained. It can only be experienced, felt, drifted away in. It is not about how good or bad you are, not about how great you look or how wonderful and expensive your instrument is. It was and never will be that. It is all about the music. It is about what you choose to express, and how well you express it.

So...

What have you expressed lately?

Why?

2008-08-20T19:23:00.000-07:00

Why do dreams disappear?
Why do tomorrows reappear?
Why is the world so round?
And why, are it's inhabitants so down?
Why is peace so rare?
And why is war everywhere?
Why are celluloid smiles all the rage?
And what's with the Digital Age?
Why are the days shorter now?
And the nights darker than ever?
A paradox unparalleled
Drifting into forever

Why are politicians so @%$#ed up?
And the people no longer a people..
Their minds blotted down and their voices turned mute
By the hands of The Evil

Political Chaos prevails|For a trivial source of combustion
Trivial it is I assure you|It has no purpose but to burn
And as we walk the walk of life|Praying for reason to survive
I see no hope without the same|A selfless motive of sacrifice

From Elusive, to Exclusive

2008-08-19T21:33:00.001-07:00

There was a time
In time gone past
Where chaos came first
And the calm, came last
When all that was good
Was all that was rare
When all that was wanted
And needed, was never there

There was a time
When The Obvious, was The Elusive
What we have now we never had then
Nothing ever was Exclusive
When freedom was a fairytale
And Equality a dream
And peace was measured in pieces
Behind barracks held by concrete beams

There was a time which wasn't now
Which is a part of the dust gone away
When unity wasn't strength
But merely, a dramatic script at play
When voices were mute, and arms dedicated to guns
So is it wrong to see, those arms held together in prayer
And heads bowed down, to a G_D that blesses Love
Instead of blessing a Tomorrow that breeds slayers

There was a time
In my yesterday
In my past gone away
I dread to say...
When the exclusive was elusive
When the ordinary meant something else
And The Rights were uncommon, hidden within books
Tucked away in laminated shelves

There was a time
And I'm glad it isn't now
Because now, now is better
Than what it was
Before...
Because now I see
A smile arise without reason
A helping hand wanting no reward
A shoulder by a shoulder
And humility and mortality
And no room for material regard...

There was a time
And I'm glad it isn't now
There was a time
And I'm glad it just was...

What's in a name?

2008-08-17T15:38:00.000-07:00

Original Idea contributed by Z. My apologies for using this idea without notice, and my gratitude for letting this stay. Thanks man.

Hello. My name is Faiz Shariff, my self-assessed shortened version of my full name: Mohammed Faizuddin Shariff, which when defined in that order in Arabic from 'Faiz', is read as: 'Winner' of 'The Faith', Decent. Doesn't make sense, but then again, what's in a name..

What's in a name? It is merely a tag, a means to differentiate, but not a definition in itself. Rejoice, for we are nowhere near the names that define us. It is what separates our comparative identity from the rest, it is what we utilize to associate ourselves and everyone else with memories good or bad, with actions just or unfair, with dreams, and with nightmares.

It is funny. If you went out on a quest to search for another individual who had the exact same name as you did(God help you if you belong to the traditional Hindu/Arab families in that case, you'd take forever then...), you would be very very surprised at how different that other person would be. And yet it is so very amusing at the same time.It is a marvel of nature, and a blunder of sorts, one that brings with it irony and wonder.

How would it be if everyone on this planet had the same name? The news would read:
Today T, son of T, married T, daughter of T, under the watchful eye of Father T, as well as their parents T and T, and T and T.

Scary.

And what if there were no names at all? What then? The same article would read as:
Today , son of , married , daughter of , under the watchful eye of Father , as well as their parents and , and and .

Does not make sense.

Good.

Now back to the point. It fascinates me as to how a name can help distinguish the very minute details in a person's identity all by itself. Just by knowing a name, a person's region, religion, status, even occupation in some cases, caste, creed, color,.. all of these attributes can be made out, or at least estimated to a certain extent. These names, however are also indirectly responsible for the disgusting existence of war, hatred, racism et cetera et cetera.

What then, is the solution?

You tell me.

Trip Tease

2008-08-13T08:01:00.000-07:00

I wanna trip real high
On marshmallow dreams in blueberry skies
With a cigarette in my hand
And a flame nearby

I wanna trip real high
Get my groove along
Let my 4stringer loose
As I sing this song

I wanna see Marley
Ride on the highway
Burnin rubber on a Harley
As he claims his stake...

I wanna see Mr. Jimi
Take his Fender out
And answer all the questions
Lost in the crowd

I wanna trip real high...

I wanna see The Man
Step right on the moon
And split it right through
And do it real soon

I wanna see the seas and the oceans
Confused in emotion
I wanna see them dry up
Like a realistic illusion

I wanna trip real high...

I wanna see you, with me by the side
Watching the stars laugh as they pass us by
I wanna see the moon smoke a joint
And get eclipsed before he makes a point
I wanna see the sun fight with the moon
For a share of the light, that dances to the tune
Of a pointless point, of a pointless same
Made by a man who lost his name..
I wanna see the tide, forget it's way
And google it up to set itself straight

I wanna trip real high..

Huh??!!!

2008-08-02T16:39:00.001-07:00

Ascripturewithoutanenclosedspacesislikeasenten
cewithoutapause,asongwithoutsilence,adaywitho
utdawn.AmIwrongthen,ifisaythattherehastobeana
turalperiodofintermittentrestbetweentheflowofpr
ocessesinthiscontinuumofkarmaandcosmicnothingness?

What if i were to say that the words in this line in themselves depict the irony of thought and contol over our lives right now? What if I told you that I could make you get up and ponder about all that I have said so far? Would you? Wouldn't you?

I don't know what you'd do forr sure, but I did make yo think about it. That's good enough for me.

It is amazing,how a few,ok,not a few,many punctuation marks thrown around in all the odd places in this sentence could really mess up your control and analysis of vocabulary and analysis of common logic?

Yo ud, ont bel.ievem e?W!ell, yo ush ould? beca useri ghtn owy"oua" ret ryin gvery hardt ofi gureo utwh atI inte ndto orra the ramt 'ryin gtoc' on veyinth eseli ne! sit, isno tawal kina "par kias sur eyo ubu titsu redoe smak e:fo rsom ewhac kyan dint eres tin grea 'ding'.

I wished for a wish...

2008-07-27T08:48:00.000-07:00

There once was a boy, who had a dream
Of scarlet skies on a sunset scene
And a river of gold, and diamond dust
And shores of cotton with a velvet crust
With a twinkle in his eye he watched the sun
The glorious rule, of another day it spun

And as he stood he saw winds at play
And peppermint greens, by the bay
And a house of stone, with a little door
Of Iroko ancient, and some more
And as he sat, and played his ivory flute
He spoke to the winds no longer mute

He spoke of the sun, and the sun heard the same
And smiled down upon him, cast a golden frame
With cosmic grandeur and heaven's grace the boy was to shine
Oh how I wish this wish was mine
Oh but it is I swear to you
It's more than a wish inside my mind
And so the boy wished, that the wish he wished was a wish of truth
And so it was, a wish of the youth

He wished for a wish, and the wish came true
The rivers turned green, and the greens turned blue
I wished for a wish, and I have no clue
Why the sun went down when i thought of you

For you am I
And I am you
And together we made
This wish come true

Thank you old friend I now remember
I saw you in the mirror this early November
And I wish you'd stay
And share my dream
Of scarlet skies on a sunset scene...

Am i?

2008-07-26T12:02:00.001-07:00

Why must I dream? Is it to dwell in a paranormal world where my limitations have no boundaries? Or is it to remind myself that the possibilities to realizing those goals locked away somewhere in the back of my head do exist?

Everyday I wake up, my mind ripped apart between both worlds, as I struggle to retain and keep with me the memory of the dream I wake up from, knowing fully well that in a few moments that it will be nothing more than a vague memory, and that no matter how hard I try to fit the pieces together, there will be quite a few that are broken and shattered, and some more that are missing. And in a few more moments, even those pieces will take their leave and depart, and return to wherever they came from. I find solace in the fact that I can still dream. That there is in me the ability to differentiate, separate, segregate, the pieces of reality and virtuality.

They said that the insane are the luckiest. They do not have a dividing line in their minds to separate the real from the unreal. Well not really, I made that up, but the point here is not who 'they' is, and why he has such a funny name. There is an interesting observation made by many I'm sure, one thought that has provoked my train of thought yet again. DO the insane really need heaven or hell? They have either right here. Does that mean that they are more satisfied than we are? It would be nice to be insane. I could no longer be bound to responsibility and other earthly things that I'm supposed to abide by. Not permanently though. Just for a moment. For one tiny moment I'd like to be free. To experience what the insane can.

But the question here is not how or why or what. The question here is...

Am i sane enough to go insane?

A wiseguy's thoughts...

2008-07-23T13:25:00.000-07:00

Wisdom is not attained through books and thoughts. It is experienced, discovered, felt. It cannot be shared through words. Cannot be written down. Cannot be drawn on canvas. Cannot be recorded on tape. Cannot be passed on without reason. It cannot be created. And it cannot be destroyed. It is elusive yet eternal, faint yet fair, it is invisible, and yet it can be seen by the soul.

Life brings the present. The present brings the past. The past brings mistakes. The mistakes bring more mistakes. These mistakes bring disorder. The disorder brings dissatisfaction. The dissatisfaction brings pressure. The pressure brings restlessness. The restlessness brings anarchy. The anarchy brings confusion. The confusion brings chaos. The chaos brings war. The war brings pain. The pain brings suffering. The suffering brings death.

Life brings the present. The present brings the past. The past brings mistakes. The mistakes bring more mistakes. These mistakes bring knowledge. The knowledge brings wisdom. Wisdom brings order. The order brings peace. The peace brings harmony. The harmony brings love. The love brings happiness. The happiness brings satisfaction. The satisfaction brings understanding. The understanding brings hope. The hope brings a vision. That vision, brings the future. That future, brings tranquility.

|

2008-07-22T12:45:00.001-07:00

~Hear me o reader /And read with mind open/For minds can see what eyes cannot/Within words unspoken/And as step you on either side/Two worlds they form and shall arise/Paths for you to choose among/If wise enough for more than one/See it clear and free your sky/Concentrate and watch the PIPE~

I see dissolutions in destitution | I see resolutions in revolution
I see hatred and pain, inside a wounded brother | I see faith and trust, I see hope in the eyes, of yet another

I see the sun burn another sky away | I see a sun rise with a brand new day
I see bomb shelters and bases, and concrete forts | I see the world as a dream of sorts
I see an empty grave, and in it, my destiny | I see an illusion, and in it I see harmony
I see wounded soldiers, and dead men on their shoulders | I see doves of peace, nesting on boulders
I see submarines diving, under the sea | I see tangerines, hanging on their trees
I see an old man, fighting for his life | I see a newborn yawn as it opens its eyes
I see secrets, buried behind shadows | I see The Northern Lights hide within their glow
I see ignorance, and I see greed | I see purity, plant its seed
I see a hand for a hand, an arm for an arm | I see them hand in hand, arm in arm
I see nightmares, that taunt me forever | I see reflections of a better era
I see frowns, and in them sorrow | I see hopes, and in them tomorrow
I see deception hide, behind plastic shrouds | I see mist and fog, within the clouds
I see TNT, in a barrel of steel | I see rosemaries, where the children kneel
I see jets and bombers in a war gone gory | I see blessed birds with feathers, sing their story
I hear bullets and gunfire, in an orchestra of gore | I hear the laughter young, the breeze flow along a symphony's score
I see pain in a world of scars | I see comets racing behind stars
I see the history of sorrow in every yesterday | I see the mystery of tomorrow in every other day
I see death arriving on my doorstep soon | I see my soul jump over the moon
I see guilt in every innocent face | I see an orchestra, inside a bass
I see nothing, and yet I see all | I am you, I am me, I am. I just am.

~To one who smart enough be/The | shall show the way to see/More than vertical line t'is/And serve it shall Its purpose there, An innuendo of sorts/ Vertical coin amiss~

Are you free, to free youself?

2008-07-20T20:07:00.000-07:00

I write this post with a heavy head, and a heavier soul. 18hrs of sleeplessness have gone by, a bad habit that I've grown to live with, and have grown very tired of. But here I am, yet again, typing away, because I believe that a thought suppressed is a thought destroyed.
This very morning as I was spending time in the early hours of the day wondering about curious everythings, puzzling somethings and condescending nothings, my half-blood brother Z lit up a cigarette. Not something my lazy eyes would notice. But there was something about this one time that caught my eye, and sent that little clock in my head ticking away into overdrive.
We have seen smokers, and we have seen smoke, but how many of us were curious about what the cigarette was going through at that very moment. A serious of chemical reactions that I dare not bore you with, but not to worry since I always sucked at chemistry, but that's not the point here. About how the flame dies out and engulfs the tip in an orange-red amalgamation of glory.
For those you who want to know and are curious, here are the estimates:

Without drawing:
Side of the lit portion: 400 deg C (or 752 deg F)
Middle of the lit portion: 580 deg C (or 1112 deg F)

Temperature during drawing:
Middle of the lit portion: 700 deg C (or 1292 deg F)

The above numbers represent the average obtained by performing several trials and can be considered accurate to within 50 deg C. A standard Fe-Cu Ni digital thermocouple thermometer was used in all trials.
(Courtesy: http://www.physlink.com/education/askexperts/ae1.cfm)

My aim in telling you all this my friend, is not to bore you with scientific facts, but to bring to your attention the power of the human mind, and the power of ignorance. We could not last two seconds with our fingers in a bowl of boiling water, which is a mere 100 deg C, but here we are, a few of us atleast, drawing away smoke that burns at 7 times the temp of boiling water. Which brings me to my point. My apologies to you dear reader, for making you go through the boring and painstaking ordeal of reading all this, but if you were not patient enough to read all this, you weren't meant to anyway.

On with the tale...

Man's behavior towards the burning cigarette and the boiling water are very similar to the sad truth of life. One cannot tolerate direct contact with 100 deg of hot water, but will bear 700 deg C of indirect smoke. You cannot tolerate another slapping you in the face, but you will willingly or helplessly turn the other cheek, when a stranger is shot dead before your very eyes. Disagree all you want my friend, but both of us know that a helpless man can do nothing but walk away. (And in response to that doubt that just popped up in your head, a man is not helpless if he chooses to stay) That is the truth. And that is the nightmare in this fairytale of fake faces and empty dreams. Some of us accept it, and some of us choose to change. Which side of the coin has your face embedded on it?

So, my friend, my question to you is....

Are you free to free yourself?

I want to see...

2008-07-10T16:48:00.000-07:00

I want to see Sepeltura play Funk.
I want to see Britney sing Death Metal.
I want to see Elvis sing Jazz.
I want to see The Beatles together again.
I want to see Led Zeppelin perform in Indian Classical.
I want to see Hendrix and Pastorius rise from the dead.
I want to see Mozart headbanging in Heaven.
I want to see Heaven.
I want to see a butterfly turn into a caterpillar.
I want to see a dream come to life.
I want to see a Leprechaun.
I want to see a blind man appreciating art.
I want to see myself playing good music.
I want to see myself gain 20 pounds.
I want to see Hell on a TV screen.
I want to see Hitler comparing his moustache with Charlie Chaplin.
I want to see all musical instruments ring in harmony. Together.
I want to see my Grandfather.
I want to see an angel smile at me.
I want to see an ostrich do the Kung-Fu.
I want to see myself play bass at the speed of light.
I want to see Satan laughing at my predicament.
I want to see myself at the point of eternal peace.
I want to see the Northern Lights.
I want to see the Pyramids from the top of Mount Everest.
I want to see peace in a world without greed.
I want to see Marilyn Monroe alive again.
I want to see a rainstorm in the Sahara.
I want to see the sun turn blue.
I want to see light in the dark.
I want to see a meteor shower.
I want to see myself in the mirror without laughing my head off.
I want to see politicians on permanent mute.
I want to see a meteor fall on my Biology teacher's house.
I want to see free music availability. Legally.
I want to see a pig fly.
I want to see The Buddha preach.
I want to see George Carlin, Live, even though he passed away.
I want to see a car run without wheels.
I want to see a million dollars burn.
I want to see the end of a rainbow.
I want to see Rowan Atkinson drunk, stoned and high.
I want to see myself seeing myself.
I want to see myself set free.
I want to see a shark stand still.
I want to see an early bird without a worm.
I want to see Marcus Miller with a Mohawk.
I want to see nobody stand next to somebody.
I want to see someone sing a Telugu version of Stairway to Heaven.
I want to see The Lochness Monster watch Bigfoot get drunk with the Boogie Monster.
I want to see a real live version of South Park.
I want to see beyond the visible spectrum.
I want to see the North Pole.
I want to see the Grim Reaper play Checkers and lose.
I want to see a proud father blessing his son.
I want to see an ill man heal.
I want to see myself see all this. I want to see life.

Words of the wise...

2008-07-08T07:09:00.000-07:00

History doesn't repeat itself, but it does rhyme. -Mark Twain

All music is folk music. I ain't ever heard no horse sing a song. -Louis Armstrong

Can we ever have too much of a good thing? -Cervantes, Don Quixote

You can't think and hit at the same time. -Yogi Berra

Sweetest Melodies
Are those that are by
distance made more sweet.
-Wordsworth, Personal Talk

Sometimes it takes a long time to play like yourself. -Miles Davis

The flute is not an instrument which has a good moral effect; it is too exciting. -Aristotle, Politics

Never looks at the trombones. You'll only encourage them. -Richard Strauss

I like to see you move with the rhythm; I like to see when you're dancin' from within. -Bob Marley

The mind is a musical instrument with a certain range of tones, beyond which in both directions we have an infinite silence. -John Tyndall(1820-1893)

Days full of wanting. Let them go by without worrying that they do. Stay where you are inside such a pure hollow not. -Rumi

The rest is silence. -Shakespeare, Hamlet, Act V, Sc 2

All times are not alike. Cervantes, Don Quixote

Music is nothing else but wild sounds civilized into time and tune. -Thomas Fuller, History of the Worthies of England

Indeed, what is there that does not appear marvellous when it comes to our knowledge for the first time? -Pliny the Elder

We see things not as they are, butas we are. -H.M.Tomlinson, Out of Soundings

A composer is someone who goes around forcing their will on unsuspecting air molecules. Often with the assistance of unsuspecting musicians. -Frank Zappa.

I never practice; I always play. -Wanda Landowska, 1952

Roaming thru the jungles of "oohs" and "ahs", searching for a more agreeable noise, I live a life of primitivity with the mind of a child and an unquenchable thirst for sharps and flats. -Duke Ellington(1899-1974)

Music is perpetual, and only the hearing is intermittent. -Henry David Thoreau(1817-1862)

Without music, life would be a mistake. -Nietzche

Servant and master am I: servant of those dead, and master of those living. Through my spirit immortals speak the message that makes the world weep and laugh, and wonder, and love, and worship.
I am Music.
-Anonymous

My idea is that there is music in the air, music all around us; the world is full of it, and you simply take as much as you require. -Sir Edward Elgar

A painter paints pictures on canvas, but a musician paints pictures on silence. -Leopold Stokowski

Musical Innovation is full of danger to the state, for when modes of music change, the laws of the State always change with them. -Plato, The Republic

Jazz isn't dead, it just smells funny. -Frank Zappa

Conductors must give unmistakable and suggestive signals to the orchestra, not choreography to the audience. -George Szell

Music which can be made anywhere, is invisible and does not smell. -W.H.Auden

I don't care too much about music. What I like is sounds. -Dizzy Gillespie(1917-1993)

See deep enough, and you see musically; the heart of nature being everywhere music, if you can only reach it. - Thomas Carlyle, Heroes and Hero Worship

Do you know that our soul is composed of harmony? -Leonardo da Vinci

You are the music while the music lasts. -T.S.Eliot

If I were to begin life again, I would devote it to music. It is the only cheap and unpunished rapture upon earth. -Sydney Smith, 1814

After playing violin for the cellist Gregor Piatagorsky, Einstein asked, "Did I play well?"
Piatagorsky replied, "You played relatively well".

Too many pieces finish too long after the end. -Igor Stravinsky

Great music is that which penetrates the ear with facility and leaves the memory with difficulty. Magical music never leaves the memory. -Sir Thomas Beecham

I write music with an exclamation point! -Richard Wagner

If music be the food of love; play on. -William Shakespeare

In music the passions enjoy themselves -Friedrich Nietzsche

Love is like a violin. The music may stop now and then, but the strings remain forever. -June Masters Bacher

Music expresses that which cannot be put into words and that which cannot remain silent. -Victor Hugo

Music has charms to soothe the savage breast, to soften rocks or bend a knotted oak. -William Congreve

Music is the movement of sound to reach the soul for the education of its virtue. -Plato

Music is well said to be the speech of angels. -Thomas Carlyle

The bear and the rabbit

2008-06-28T11:43:00.000-07:00

Once a bear and a rabbit were quietly and peacefully attending to nature's call by the side of a river. The bear turns around and asks the rabbit: "Excuse me, would you get offended if any of my download were to get on your fur." "No", replied the rabbit. So the bear cleaned itself with the rabbit.

The End.

Don't ask. I didn't make the damn joke,

10 greats...

2008-06-28T11:35:00.000-07:00

What is the easiest way to start a band??

Read the followin steps:
1)Hear some lame Nu-metal track.
2)Get inspired.
3)Decide to start a band, get rich,n get famous.
4)Take no steps to achieve ur goal, instead, DAYDREAM!!!
5)Decide whos gonna play what instrument.
6)Spread the news of the rise of a great new rock band(Urs naturally).
7)Learn to actually play something, so that ppl actually respect u.
8)By the time u actually get serious, part seperate ways.
9)Regret for the rest of ur life.
10)Read this Message.
11)Start a band with new spirit n hope.
12)Keep playin, n Rock On!!!

-Faiz Shariff

***************

Basic Theory: Moshing n headbanging

1)Drink loads of booze.
2)Add sufficient doses of weed for good measure.
3)Enter the pit.
4)Bang ur head(Not on another).
5)Shove, push n pull people around.
6)If ur big n bulky, make people fall n bleed.
7)If ur small n puny, fall n bleed on people.
8)Get up, rinse, repeat.
9)Repeat steps 1,2,4 n 5.Step 3 can be repeated if ur puny ass is kicked out of the pit.
10)Banging n shaking ur head all over the place, along with moshing n shovin ur weight(n other people) earns u the respect of the other fellow rockers. It is however, contagious, n could land ur ass into trouble if ur not careful, which u wont be considering ur ass is already stuffed with an overdose of booze and dope.

PRECAUTION:Take the trouble of making sure that the band is actually playing before u do all this. Precaution can be declared void if ur carcass is already too high on dope n booze.

Thats it.Happy headbanging.
N ROCK ON!!!
-FAIZ

*******************

10 great ways to chase your audience away:

1. The city where you get your next job needs meaningful posters. Put phrases on it like "Faster than Yngwie" or, "The god has landed".
2. Always wear dark sunglasses when you go on stage and welcome your audience with the legendary sentence, "Hello you crazy motherf......s."
3. If you make a mistake on the guitar, cast an angry look towards your bass player and apologize for your musicians through the microphone.
4. If it's too obvious that you made that mistake, play it over and over again. The audience will think that it's a part of that song.
5. Always remind your audience that it is so great to be back in the USA again!
6. Always carry messages in your songs. Child-Work, social disease, unemployment, war, environmental pollution - put it all in one song and let your audience feel that you have the solution.

7. Don't tune your guitar before you play. Keith didn't either.

8. Buy some new stuff for your guitar amp and read the instructions on stage.

9. Don't miss playing a bonus track at the end of the show. The audience is so fascinated with your playing and your appearance, it's been so mind-blowing and spectacular, that they just forgot to call for it.

10. Play a love song with great lyrics, "I heard your voice in the wind over the mountains where the moonlight shined in the deep blue sea, and an eagle told me that you belong to me..." or something like that.

NOTE:Everything written above is meant purely for humour. Some might like it, some might not. Cheers.

Origins

2008-06-07T04:30:00.001-07:00

Long ago when i was a little boy without a purpose I would spend many a days gazing out at the stars and hoping that one of them fell on my biology teacher. That never happened. SO i kept gazing harder the next few times. Still didn't work so I stopped gazing and just passed out of high school and got it over with. Intermediate Education was another pain in all the wrong places with me getting into shit at all the wrong times and getting beaten up by all my sirs all because ofbad timing and the amazing ability to get caught at just the right time... when my hands were BRIGHT red. In this sad time of my life I met another boy who, though a lot lot bigger in size, had the same sized brain and the same stupid outlook about life. It clicked and we'd spend many days by the road eating chinese noodles or chatting away in Irani cafes collectively paying for chai and other essential commodities. Time passed and soon we moved on out into the big bad world of Engineering. The stupidest thing that i have done so far. I could never think that 4 yrs in that place could ruin the discipline and nerdiness that 18yrs of life had worked on. Praneeth bhai zindabad!! He's the coolest no? No?

And time moved on.

One day when I was smoking spiked hooka in the mystical himalayas i came across another boy, who, like me, had a fetish for navy cut cigs and strings on wood. It was a wonderful day, though i have no memory as to how. Ahem.. so then we sat down and smoked until our lungs begged us to stop. A full-filling day that was. The boy inherited my stratocaster and has been doing justice to it ever since. In return he gave me the assurance of life long sutta sharing company n the secret promise that he'd laugh at my jokes even when they aren't funny. Fair enough. Life has changed since then.We turned brothers and have been fighting injustice and have dedicated our lives to saving the world from Britney Spears and Himesh Reshammiya. Yup. Zubair's the man. ANd ya I have official rights to make a fool of myself, and drag him down along with. Whatte convenient it is...

And so Orions Belt was formed. And we're still jobless.

GrooveTown

2008-06-07T04:28:00.000-07:00

Take me Groove, take me now
Underneath the rainbow, over the clouds
Beyond common sense, and what seems to be real
Take me away to the place that can heal
And then show me, a reason to feel alright
A reason to smoke my fears away, into the night
Take me away, to GrooveTown
To the town of Groove
Where a smile and a vibe
Can heal all that's impure....

It was a cold Monday morn, smoked screened window pane
The sun went shallow, but the breeze stayed the same
I went kaliedoscopic, had the groovy Monday blues
So I lit up another, stepped up, and got outta my shoes
I picked up my bass, my significant other
The one nailing that groove all over the floor
And even though I was meant for strings six
I was happy with four, no less, no more

A sweet little slide, and a lil jazz on that bend
Open hammer pluck all the way to the end
This is nice man, its all good, its all funk
There's always more groove than I had THUNK

A slap and a pop, funk feelin free
I may be crazy bu that ain't stoppin me
And just then right there...
Wah-wah, the pedal screams
Hammer-on a pull-off a hammer-on
Whatever that means...

Grooves in the air, sweet mellow scream, sweet mellow scare
So i go on the sly and slip in another vibe, right there
A-minor G-major... Good Lord, I don't care
I just know how to trip I guess that's fair
Bend the funky C, and slide it to the A
Smoke sweet nicotine, and fly far away...

dreamtime

2008-05-22T01:11:00.000-07:00

I am stuck in an actual dream, not imaginary, not alleged, nor ideal. And yet it all seems to be real. I am stuck in time before time, in a moment that cannot decide if it is void or infinite. Stuck in an existence I ponder upon.

Why?

Why am I here? Why are we here? Questions that raise the possibilities of an infinite array of impossible reasons which in my opinion are best left unanswered. What about G_D you ask? What about heaven and hell? What about angels and demons and Santa Claus and the little imp who steals your last cigarettes just when you let your guard down for that one tiny moment of time you ask?

Well.. I don't know. And if you're expecting to find answers to these questions here, press *ALT+F4*.

Wandering souls wandering without reason to feel needed or worthy. Wandering with the hope of a better tomorrow only because today does not shine. Wandering for the light, and followed by the darkness. Shadows searching for a smile on their empty faces devoid of emotion, yearning for solace in loneliness, or loneliness in solace.

I am not here to start a debate on what exists and what doesn't. It is not in my nature to sit down and explain anything to anyone, BUT, if you're willing to listen, AND, are patient enough to sit through the painful ordeal of reading this post, I'm sure you'll find a few interesting things here and there(hopefully).

In the past few days I have shared a conversation with a few intellectuals regarding the biggest question(or so it may seem) of them all.

What is the meaning of life? What is our purpose? Why are we here? Et cetera et cetera...

Pardon me. I could not put up the questions as one single question.

Among the people that I had the privilege of sharing this conversation with(a majority of which are dear friends), are:
(1) A brother who shares not blood, but soul... (Z)

(2) Another brother whom I've known for 6 years now. Sarcasm and common sense seem to be his best traits, the former being the most annoying thing you can ever experience. (K)

(3) A kid with whom I share quite a few tastes in music and who, like me, also has a well-developed fetish for strings on wood and surreal variations in music.(R)

(4) A girl who, apart from being an extreme metal fan, is fascinated with death, and does a brilliant job of justifying the same. Don't ask. Deep 'deep' logic going on here... (D)

(5) And a few others whom I do not know well enough to describe in a person. Nonetheless it was a pleasure sharing thoughts and ideas.

Now on with the tale...

Life is death. Life is purpose. Life is experience. Life is everything and yet nothing at all. Life is an amalgamation of every experience, every ideal, every motive, every purpose and every existence. It would not do justice to describe life as one word, one idea, one definition, because doing that would mean that you were to segregate it, separate it, dissolve it, as a completely independent individual entity, which in my opinion, it is not.

There is more to life than purpose. There is more to it than start and end, and then there is the void in between the two. There is more to it than using emphatic words to frame a flashy description. Life is not about purpose. It is about experience. which in turn defines the purpose. Regardless of what you say or do, what you choose to experience, be it victory, satisfaction, pain, joy, sorrow, anything and everything is defined by what you choose to experience in life. And hence you choose to experience, and ergo your purpose is sub-consciously decided for you, by you. and maybe, just maybe, leading it in silence without bitching/ or complaining about it or analyzing it would be a good idea. It helps to have a train of thought that goes beyond dissecting the intricacies laid down upon us by the continuum of eternal life. In short, it is wise choose to ignore the lines between the lines, and concentrate on the notes between the notes.

"Ive always believed that there is a force that pushes us forward in life. And Im here to discuss about it. " What is it? Greed? Thirst? Desire?"

The above quote signifies the start of this entire ordeal.

It is indeed true that there is an unknown force that drives us to push forward, and yet again, we know not what it precisely is. Notice how I utilize the word 'precisely' to eliminate the existence of any doubtful or assumed possibilities. There is not definite answer to the question. No definite solution to the puzzle. We live in a dream inside a dream. And as long as we're living, it is not the purpose that defines us, it is the motive.

Think about that. Good night, and Goodbye.

..:the sounds of silence:..

2008-02-17T20:04:00.000-08:00

Sunday morning... Heavy head, heavier soul. I wake up, i drag myself to the nearest mug of coffee. Too many things in my head, and i need to get them out. Reason overcomes randomness today. Today, i can think, i can reason, i can deduce meaninglessness. I've given up on pondering over things i can't decide, given up on wondering what i'm doing with my life, i, have given up on everything my thought of reason has no influence on. What I've not given up on, is faith.

Faith. Small word, bigger meaning. Relative. Means a lot to those who believe, and yet nothing to those who don't. I spread my wings of silver, and jump. I only pray, that I fly. I do not know if I will. I know not if i shall fail. I don't care.

rage|greed|revenge|motive|purpose|existance|joy|sorrow|emotion|pain|G_D|nothing|everything|nothing at all
We are compressed into smaller spaces of wisdom, corridors and doors shut off from everything all around, no rain no sunshine, no blessing, no crime, only static, standing still in time. I long to find myself on paths lit with eternal shine, yet to be seen, yet to be discovered.

Free yourselves. The time is here. The time is now.

PS- Not all mine. Ram helped.

..:sanctum sanctorum:..

2008-02-10T14:03:00.000-08:00

.:sanctum sanctorum:..

I was lost
In a dream perhaps
And I found shelter
In a shrine of peace
I was comforted
I felt safe
Under the rain
And the northern breeze
I saw no pain
I saw no sorrow
I saw a smile
On tomorrow

I was happy in my shrine
Happy as can be
I saw the Love of Power
Diminish
And replaced in turn
By the Power of Love
I saw power
In the human soul
I saw rhapsody
I saw a tomorrow
I saw clouds make way
For a brand new sun
I saw hatred disappear
And i saw, that a new day
Had begun

In that very shrine
I saw a little boy
Quiet he was
With eyes burning like fire
'I have a name',
"Tell me"
I asked...
'Human desire', he said.
Take me into shelter, he asked
And show me a world of peace
Show me a world with no sorrow
With no hatred, greed or disease
I laughed.
The boy was a fool.
I cannot show him what he asks of me
I am mortal
I am uno, unus, monos
I am one
And alone,
I am helpless.
I cannot please the little boy
And i see his smile fade away
I ask him to keep his faith
And i bid goodbye.

Life, is a paradiddle...

2008-02-10T13:09:00.000-08:00

..:life is a paradiddle:..

Life. A euphemism for the temporary period of existance that we spend on this green elemental ball floating around in the cosmos. It's funny actually, the fact that we take it for granted. Frankly, I think we're all idiots... except for Hendrix, Wooten and George Carlin. Why? I like em, thats why, so quit sulking and read on. Don't argue with me, i can give u a headache.

Come to think of it, in a wierd ironic sort of way, everyone here is an artist, a magician, a traveller of a cosmic journey. An artist, a painter, they work with colours. A magician works with illusions, weaving the "impossible" by tapping the human mind. A photographer plays with light, with the photo-genetic spectrum. A philosophpher weaves wisdom through the mistakes of all those around, and thru his own. He observes in silence, and is emphatic in his perspective of the common world. A psychologist does the same, at a more intricate and detailed level. Scientists, all kinds, dedicate themselves to the elements. Musicians are dedicated to the arrangement of sounds in rhythm, thats music Einstein. Actors play with emotion. Writers and poets...well... these gifted people play with words. A comedian plays with humour, and i'm glad these people
share there existance with us. They make the world slightly more comfortable to live in.

If you think about it, life is KINDA like a bus ride, we're the passengers, destiny is driving the damn thing, and ironic thing is, even if you're sitting in your cosy windows seat watching everything pass you by, the fact that you're getting everywhere, and nowhere at the same time is, well, scary. The solution to the problem?? Buy a damn bicycle and get off the the damn bus.

A smokey revelation...

2007-10-24T02:50:00.000-07:00

Life can be a b*tch at times. Love. A far fetched concept in my opinion. Something you rad as a kid in fairy tales and look up at the sky wondering and wishing for eternal loving company that is apparently supposed to last forever? Will it??

A pack of nicotine tainted cigarettes is far more reliable in my point of view, well at least when compared to concepts lifted from fairy tales and dreams. They say they'll, them smokes, and they stick to their word. That's reliable enough ain't it?

I'm no cynic, am more practical actually. I refuse to believe that I will ever find true love, until I get it. Greedy, stupid, selfish, call me whatever you want, but that's just how I am.

..:the.smoke.theory:..

Ever saw a cigarette burn? How one end is consumed by the flame, and how smoke is exhaled into the air in a cloud of smokey glory? My theory is based on that very phenomenon. That we burn. Burn. Burn some more. And thus end up as a discarded product of the very environment we live in. It is something that we all know. We all do. We're gonna die some day. But is it necessary to burn? Is it necessary to be the ash, when we can choose to e the smoke, free and dissolved? Smoke. It is something that has a momentary visible existence. A few seconds and it's gone. But it's beautiful. For the few seconds that it exists, it leaves a mark on the eye of the beholder. To me it does. I guess. It has a source. The flame. The flame and the smoke live mutually in condescending harmony. The smoke is a different world altogether.

The Oxford dictionary defines a cigarette as a thin cylinder of finely cut tobacco rolled in paper for smoking, and nicotine, as a toxic oily liquid found in them smokes. Whatever. I never cared about the details. Not scientifically at least. I I never liked Oxford anyway. You smoke, get a high, and come back to ground zero. Not a big deal, but some of us need something to keep us occupied, and look busy.

..:psyko_babel:..

2007-10-08T07:36:00.000-07:00

..:psyko_babel:..
Funky psychobabble,
Listen up to your song
Basses slap and pop,
And you can hum along
Like smoke on a river,
A feather on a cloud
The incline in a shiver
Floating all around...
Like smoke on a river,
The sun split in two
Like the sound of silence,
Misunderstood,
Are you??
Eyes mesmerizing,
So beautiful, so brown
Like a dying sunset
Burning to the ground
Or barbequed chicken maybe
Heck, your eyes
They're perfect to me.
And a smile as sweet,
As the southern springs i see
Your presence overclouds,
Everything around the scene
All around me
All around me
You're misunderstood at times,
Like...
Infinity.

Red hot, like the
Chili peppers in your head
Grin on your face,
That seems to stop everyone dead
Inside out
Or outside in
No doubt about it
That you're
Crystal clear
Within...
Faded jeans
Converse light blue
The sky's at your feet
Heck...
So is everone else too.
A heart of gold
And some grey cells too
So MINDFULL are you,
So BRAINFUL
Lol..
Yup.
Its true.

"Comparatively tall"
She sez, I agree
But you don't to be
Shorter
To look up to this girl
Six strings by her finger
And a scent of perseverance
All around, it lingers
Six strings, and
An ipod, that glares
Head on her shoulders
And sarcasm?
Loads to spare...
No air castles
No colourful rainbows
And no butterflies
No smokey visions
And no backlash
And no...
Lies.
You've got your life
Handed to you
In a golden plate,
But with
A battered spoon
And yet you
Never complain
Never do you sigh
Headstrong you are
From within
But keep forgetting
No worries though
Thats where
I come in....

Funky psychobabble
Spread out your wings
With feathers of gold
And wings of silver
Spread out your wings
And fly with me
Into the halcyon blue...
On clouds of silver
And winds of smoke
And peppermint mountains too
Leave the sun behind
Leave the mountains behind
Leave the smoke and the gardens too
They love you as well
They know you enough
To know get back through.

Like a little dragonfly
With kalaedoscopic wings
Of Oblivion and babble
And funky little things
Of chocolate doughnuts
And 6 inch subs
Of Ipods and music
And little bear cubs
Of metal and funk
And the joy it brings
A silly little girls
Wrapped around 6 strings...
Disguised as a friend
She entered our lives
Shared her share
Of PJs,
And smiles.
I don't know you very well
Maybe I do
I don't care
But i know
I'll never regret meetin ya
And i'll always
Be...
There.

Hey psychobabble
I hope you're gettin all of this
You're never alone
The bassie offers his bliss.
I'll be honest here
I respect you to death
But tick me off
And I'll bonk your head
Lol, o yes,
I have a song to write
A lil poetic
A testimonial
Of a girl and her flight
No sugarcoated crap
No sappy dialogues I'm sure
I'm writing straight from the soul
So yes,
I'm sure...
I'm no James Blunt
No Shakespeare either
But to look into you
I needn't be
A bigshot writer...
You're cool, and amazing
I needn't be
An Einstein
To see...
Snappy and volatile
Yes you are
But then...
So's Chemistry.
People misunderstand you
They're too blinded to see
And they get you all wrong
They don't realize
That with the light
The shadows come along

Hey funky dragonfly
With peppermint wings
Fly thru the horizon
Thru heaven and its sin
In the middle of the night
Or in the middle of nowhere
Im sorrows, in tomorrow
I'll always be there
When a tear appears
Or a smile disappears
When times turn hollow
Think of a prayer
Think of the idiot who wrote you this
I'll be there
Lookin over your shoulder
To lend a smile
And borrow a frown.

Amen.

Note: Dedicated to a great friend!! Rock on Babble!!

Sunny dewdrops by the water

2007-10-05T05:17:00.000-07:00

Sunny, dewdrops by the water
Swimming down, like disorder
I see them shine away
I see them fade today
No more dewdrops from where I'm lookin from....
Sunny dewdrops, by the water
Embrace me now and take me home today.....

Sunny rainbows smoky fires
Lightin down into desires
Free me now and see me...
Disappear.
Hollow mountains growing higher
Crystal clear like a fire
Shadows voices fade away again.

Sunsets and rising tides..
All around with me inside
Psychadelic
Voodoo charm
I'm on the rainbow
The world in my arms

Disappear and fade away
Make tomorrow a yesterday
With words of meaning that seem so clear
Smile away
And disappear...

a beautiful dream...

2007-10-03T01:57:00.000-07:00

As i sit here
In my piazza
Surrounded by shadows of the gloom
I awaken, and chance upon
A vision of the moon
And in it, I see your face
As I sit here lost in doubt
You give me hope and reason
To free myself again.

I feel the hollow disappear
And as you shine, I feel your warmth
Everywhere
And in it I comfort myself
In your afterglow
There is no more sorrow
There is no tomorrow
Just this moment
Wrapped around my fingers
And your sweet intoxication
Your sweet heavenly scent
Of apricots and desert flowers
All around it lingers
And I keep it all
For myself
Forever...

I keep it for myself
Forever
In my little box filled
With dreams of silver
I see butterflies when you're around
I feel warmth with your gentle touch
And once again
I see myself
Drift away...
With wings of silver
Feathers laced with love
I feel a shiver
Eternity ain't long enough.

I feel dew drops
Drip across your face
I see rainbows
All over the place
My little piazza
Shines with love now
I'm not alone anymore
I have you by my side...

I had a dream last night
I spent some time with an angel
With a ticklish smile
And a walk of grace
Filled with love
She held my hand
And walked with me

She chose a few seconds
Of human touch
To an eternity
Of heavenly flight
She gave up wings of silver
She gave up angelic flight
And the Gardens of Eden
Just for a moment of love
A moment by my side...

I could not fly with her
And so she walked with me
She gave up heaven
And for her, I'd give up eternity
I see her all the time
I love her, I am hers
And she is mine...

She is my dream
My prayer, my blessing
She is my joy
My smile, my tear
She is my strength
My weakness, and my bliss
She is mine.
I love her.

She is my favorite girl
In the whole wide world
She's nice
She gives me reason
To smile.
Actually...
She is the reason I smile
When sorrow surrounds me
And when it makes me blind
She's always there
To hold my hand
And show me the light

Her love is reason enough
For me to carry on without a tear
To get up every time I fall down
Even if she's not with me
Her love tries to fill her absence
Her love is enough for the two of us
And so is mine
So is mine
So is mine...

She's sweeter than the Apricots in Heaven
And Peppermint candy too...
And cherry pie, with berries blue...
Her tender cheeks seem softer to me
Than the clouds that underline heaven
I love her
I am hers
And she is mine...

She has hair so beautiful
And a smile that'd make angels blush
If I could
I'd give her wings of GOLD
So that she could fly in God's own garden
With other angels
Who have wings of SILVER
In paradise
Where she came from...

She makes me forget the music
The funk and the jazz
Such affection she has
She makes me forget the bass
She defines me
And holds me in place
She makes me forget all the sorrow
All the pain
All the struggles
And all the strain

To her:
I love you
You mean the world to me
You give meaning to my purpose
You're my sugarcoated fantasy
A fantasy that's real
A fantasy that's mine...
I love every moment that I spendwith you
Every minute, every second
I love you so much
That it hurts to say goodbye
I love you like the wind loves the moon
Like flowers love the rain
Like bees love their honey
And fools love their pain.
I love you
As much as life itself
Which seems so so beautiful
Just because you're around
I don't know how much...
I just know that I do.

Note: Jus another poetic project i was workin on... I'm no romantic lol...

Buddha appears

2007-10-03T01:56:00.000-07:00

buddha appears

I had a dream
Of blood and battle
Of power and greed
And as i lay
Wounded by the material motive
Of humanity
I saw THE END
But as I prayed
I saw light
Buddha appeared
And all else disappeared

I was set free.
I was happy.

Now....
.
.
.
If only
.
.
This
.
.
.
was
.
.
.
.
real.

A plastic cloud

2007-10-03T01:55:00.000-07:00

Here i lay
Within the clouds
On one that is my own
But mine is not of magical cotton
Of purity of the highest degree

It's made of plastic
And it's not pure
But yet
Here I am
And as far as you're concerned
I'm floating on my cloud nonetheless

Just so you know,
I can fly too.

sweet poison surprise:::moonshine giftwrapped in gelatin time

2007-10-03T01:53:00.000-07:00

sweet poison surprise:::moonshine giftwrapped in gelatin time

See the sun, exhaust itself
And prepare to set
See the moon claim the moment
And rise with a smile
Don't let the mighty sun
Burn your smile to the ground
Let Him be for He is tired
Let Him take a breath
Shine with the moon
The underrated satellite
Embrace moonshine instead

The Altar beckons...

This borrowed sanity
This apparent weakness
Seem null and void to me
Like faded memory gone distant
Like crushed up leaves
Carried by the breeze...
The old shall set
While the new shall rise
And here I sit
With open doors and an anticipated gaze
For my Sweet Poison Surprise...

And finally I see
What I perceive
A mellow facade
A puppetshow on wheels
O what glory it beckons
What stories it reveals
These destitute illusions
These fading reflections
Of cacophonies of symphony
Harmonized by rhyme
A gathering is assembled
And a prayer is called
And angels are summoned
To the Altar, tainted with Exile
Like a sweet mellow breeze
Lost in itself
Kissing the lips of the Nile...
Like a rainbow gone colourblind
I see a rush of emotive loss
A definition gone meaningless
Laced with a synonym of remorse...

Welcome to the Altar of New Dimension
A sweet poison surprise:::moonshine giftwrapped in gelatin time

my dream

2007-10-03T01:50:00.000-07:00

~~my dream~~

As i sat there, in my piazza
Feeling the wind, pass me by
I saw a beautiful angel, smile upon, me
An angel, sent from the sky

As i saw her face, I saw her smile,
And right then and right there, I forgot about the wind
A thought entered my mind, and it set me free
Was I in love, or did i drift into eternity?

She smile again, and i forgot about time
I forgot about the breeze, and clouds with silver lines
She was everywhere, in my eyes, in my mind
How beautiful was she, i cannot define...

A beautiful nymph, with heaven's grace
Rays of moonshine, adorn her face
I lost myself, in those eyes
As she's gazed upon me, with love
An angel for sure, sent down from up above

And as i gathered courage, to ask her name
She smiled, and readied herself, to fly fly away
This I couldn't see, and so I grabbed her hand
To hold her, embrace her forever, held her upon the land

She was mine now, and I, hers
We were in heaven, with the stars in reverse
The moon looked upon us, and the sun smiled
We were blessed, and together, with love in our eyes

Is this love? Or is this a dream?
Is this absolute? Or just bent reality?
Is this feeling of acceptance, this feeling of affection
A part of the dream, or a new part of me?
And as I played with her hair, I saw her fade away
And as i struggled, to get her back
I felt sunshine, creep up upon my face...

Wake up son
Rise and shine
My mother's voice
Echoed in my mind...

Curses!!!
I lost her again!!!
But i still dream
I still search for her face
The one sent down from heaven
The one one with love and grace...

And so it was, the tale now ends
Of a mortal and a spirit, of Terra Firma, and Paradise....

Angel AK47

2007-10-03T01:44:00.000-07:00

Free my demons
Save my grace
They're all angels
Out of place
Like blood n fire
In a glass
Like smoke from a fire
They fade so fast

Booze in, smoke out
Weed kicks in
2nd stage Euphoria
That I'm living in
Cant stand straight
Everythings slippin
Cant see her pretty face anymore
It all starts trippin
I feel, like a winner
A periodic sinner
Its all gone now
My blood gets thinner

I think about her, 24-7
She's an Angel
Sent down from heaven
So I send her back,with an AK-47

Sense is common
No reason for demons
To reside in your head
Like fighting yourself
A reason good enough
To bleed to your death
Like recollected past
Bits of paper and ash
Sweat, tears, cries and screams
The blood of the battle
And the pain in between
Feel like a God
I know that I'm not
Know I'm going down
To suffer.
Rot.
I think about her again
Straight 24-7
She's an Angel
Brought down from heaven
I send her back
With an AK-47.

a tribute... to music.

2007-09-20T08:26:00.000-07:00

~~the guitarist~~

I see the guy, walk into the cafe
Hazy-eyed, and a gaze of pride
A jacket of leather, the scent of smoke
And a jet black guitar, by his side...
A dark hat he wears, with a tint of grey
With a smile that belonged, and seemed to stay

He sits, keeps his better half on another chair
I see him smile, call the waiter and then look all around
Searching for others, like him who were
Simple, yet profound

He takes out a cigarette, and smoke soon follows
Smokey rings in the air, ripples gone hollow
He scratches his chin, where a soul-patch stays in place
He lets out a grin, and gives me that hazy-eyed gaze...

He throws away the bud, and then the smoke is gone
There is silence for a moment, and harmony is born
A plectrum is, what a plectrum does
And boy does it do it well
For notes embraced tone, and filled up the place
Like a forgotten viking spell

The people take notice, and their gaze followed
To this dark stranger, who tamed his melody
With a tint of invisible colour, and disguised sorrow
Ethereal it seemed, his harmony to me

The strums got faster, and rhythm walked along
Wheels of motion, moving together, forming the song
He wanted to scream, but he couldn't I knew
So he let his guitar, do the talking through
And emotions leapt out, from the musician within
I saw tritones, embrace metal strings...

The melody claimed its share
And applause soon followed
And soon he was done, he got up to leave
And as he passed the window pane, I saw his face
And surprisingly he looked
A lot like me...
********************************
~~the headbanger~~

The Metal beckons
The metal screams...
It is time...

The Men
Have awoken
The Mosh
Has awoken

The headbanger
A loyal follower of the metal
Of the Distortion
Of Guitar riffs and Double bass
Insane solos kept in place
Some drink
Some smoke
He dissolves into the music...

Of Symphonic melody
Of Harmonic Sound
Of Heavy Metal Tone
Rocking the ground

I am one.
I'm proud to be
Its just music
Used to set you free
So embrace the Metal
Dissolve inhibition
Erase doubt
Set yourself free...

Rock on.
********************************
~~jazz heals~~

Six strings
And a saxophone
Plus a, big bad synth
That holds its own
Four strings, you call it the bass
Brought down to nail that tone
Chip in, some drums n sticks
And I say I'm comin home!!

That's jazz for ya
No questions asked
Musical Art
12-tone scales on brass
Then there's Modal jazz
It abandoned chords
A Different Art
Of Musical Force

Ah the glory
That Jazz can bring
Of souls and spirits
That learnt to sing
I salute these people
They showed me life
They showed me meaning
Whenever
I passed by...

Of bent and blue
And melody too
The rhythm and bass
Reside in you
Of rhymes and tales
And words of the soul
This is Jazz...
Get out,
Or lose control.

Free yourself.
It will take care of the rest
Jazz is not a genre
It is a definition
It is not music.
It is the language of the soul.
It has no words.
Because the soul does not speak.
It only sings.
Free yourself.
And see the light,
That jazz can bring...

Jazz heals.
********************************
~~the bass~~

I am consumed.
By the funk.
By the bass.
By the slap.
And the Pop.

I am consumed,
By the groove.

It is addictive.
And I'm addicted.
An addict,
If you may.

For you see...
The bass is not,
A mere instrument of choice,
Or preference....
It is part of the soul...
The Inner Soul.
The Holy Spirit.
The prayer.
And the blessing.
It embraces those in it's path.
It absorbs their essence.
Substance.
Shine in the light...
For you may never shine again.

It is immortal.
Eternal.
Amaranthine.
Deathless.
Embrace it,
For it shall embrace you.
Shine in its light.
In its blessing.
Revel in its shine.
Glow,
In its shadow.
Become one,
With the bass.
And watch.
Watch everything...
Dissolve...
Into Holy, Seraphic, Nothingness.
********************************

nothingness is a part of everything

2007-09-14T03:52:00.000-07:00

Nothingness, is in everything. And everything, is in nothingness. And while everything around flies by me with an inevitable threat to fall down, collapse, and crumble, while hanging in the balance by a long silvery thread that taunts my very existance, my helplessness, and my incapacity to do anything about it. Do we have in ourselves the strength, the ability, or the capacity to realize and serve the very purpose that we came here for??

The fog fades aay
The road is clear
Our vision is clear
Our purpose is clear
The rain has stopped
There is only silence now
Holy unholy silence
Revel in its glory
Lest it pass you by

Survival. The basic purpose of human existance. To live. To breed. To explore the unexplored. To experience, the unexperienced. Freedom. Love. Peace. Pieces of dreams that have been chipped off by the hands of the Almighty G_D himself. Is this all real? You, me, everything, nothing, time, space, the sky, the stars, the sun, the moon, are we all for real? I do not know. I never have. But that won't stop me from trying to find out.....

As i sit here in my room, wondering if the 21 years of my existance have served any meaningful purpose at all, I am taunted by the very dread of doubt that clouds all of us, one that haunts poeple for years together. Doubt. A word that seems so small and harmless, and yet... so evil. so powerful. so....

demonic.

Yes. I have served y purpose. We all have. That is how the world runs, that is how it works and functions effectively. I am here merely to live, to put it in as simple a phrase as possible. To live. But is that all there is to it? Is that all I was sent here for? Surely there must be a higher purpose, a higher meaning to all of this...

There is. Yes.

But I'll never know, unless I keep trying...

blue prayer

2007-09-12T23:53:00.000-07:00

...blue prayer

This is my story
Of a blue prayer
That I hold in my heart
It resides in my soul
Taunting me
To lose control
To set myself free
From my own inhibitions
Of failure and grief

Of pain and sorrow
I know it is not
Rather
It is the opposite
Of a curse laced with deciet
A little prayer
That I hold
In the palm of my hand
That holds the key
To my little box of prayers and dreams

A prayer as blue
As the wings of a Halcyon
A memory of the life that I've lived
A good one I'd say
With love and peace
Blessed by a smile
Sent by the sun
And the stars too
They love to watch
And they talk to the moon
To wake up and observe
That a little prayer
Can attract
The celestial beings up above...

Welcome to creation.

I am not very fond of this story
It brings with it pain and sorrow
But I've kept the moral for myself
Quit today
And LIVE tomorrow.

LIVE.
A simple little word
That defines all of us
Wake up from your deep slumber
There is no "late"
No "never"
There is only "now"
The very moment...
Embrace it
Treasure it
Hold it in the palm of your hand
And seal it forever in your little box
Of dreams and memories
Don't ever open that box to find peace and joy
Jus because you don't have any in the moment
Open it to remind yourself
That this is what you've gone through
Smile
Awaken to a new day
Of peace
Of joy
Of love and blessing.
Money,power,fame,fortune..
These are just words in fairy-tales
Words that have no meaning
Words that are empty and hollow
Awaken
A new day is upon us
Shine with it's blessing
Dwell into it's prayer
Open your wings of silver
And fly away
And if you prefer not to
Walk with the ones you love.

This is my dream.
This is my vision.
And this is my prayer.
May you all find peace, love, good-health and prosperity.
God bless.

AMEN

..:A smoker and his cigarette:..

2007-09-12T23:50:00.000-07:00

Me and my cigarette
We've spent many a good time together
Through winds of motionless smoke
That seem to drift away forever
Ah yes..
Motionless smoke
And faded memories

I inhale from it
It's life
Given to me with a smile
And while seem
To exhale the pain
I see a light
Shimmering through the breeze

As i lay on the altar
With my so-called "friend"
This fairy tale fades
And i see it end...
A crushed up dream
Thrown away
With a smirk and a grin
That's gone today
Flashbacks
And flashes in the sky
Taunt haunted memories
To pass me by...

Visualize
Conceptualize
And then
Realize
That as you see the cigarette burn
You see pain in the sky
And with a fire in the clouds
The collapsed consciousness...
It returns...
Welcoming me
With open arms
And accepted grief...
And with a warm embrace
I am ushered in
Into walls of slumber
Never to return
Cursed to remain
Within it
Trapped within
The curse of irony...

And then the smoke
It returns
The pain drifts away
And the consciousness that resides within me
It awakens
And I see
The light
Again
I see a prayer
Laced with blessing
And zealous hope

I wake up
And I'm alone
There is no smoke
There is no pain
There is no grief
I feel free now
Free from the clutches
Of the very dream
That i had created
With my very own hands...
I feel free now
I feel relieved...
So much so that...
I go back to sleep.